Category: Marriage

When a Husband Chooses His Wife’s Wishes over God’s – 2025 Day 40 (Genesis 16)

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Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Psalm 8, Genesis 16.

“And Sarai said to Abram, ‘Behold now, the LORD has prevented me from bearing children. Go in to my servant; it may be that I shall obtain children by her.’ And Abram listened to the voice of Sarai.”

– Genesis 16:2 ESV

Why, oh why, did Abram listen to his wife?

If only he had said, “No, Sarai. We must trust the Lord and wait upon Him. He is the generous giver of everything good. He will give us a child in His timing.”

It reminds me of Genesis 3 when Adam chose to listen to the voice of Eve rather than trusting and obeying God.

“And to Adam, [God] said, ‘Because you have listened to the voice of your wife and have eaten of the tree of which I commanded you, “You shall not eat of it,” cursed is the ground because of you; in pain you shall eat of it all the days of your life;'”

– Genesis 3:17 ESV

Both Adam and Abram faced lifelong consequences from their decision to heed their wives’ poor counsel.

Wives, we need to be very careful what we say to our husbands. Our husbands will so often go along with our suggestions – or demands – because they trust us, or they want to make us happy, or they just want to make us stop complaining. We need to recognize the power we have in our marriages and consider carefully the consequences of the words we speak.

Will you join me in praying for our husbands (and ourselves) today?

Heavenly Father, You are a good God who loves to give good gifts to Your children. Your timing is always perfect. Please help us to trust You. Help us to wait patiently for Your perfect gifts. Let us not grow weary of doing good. Let us not give way to unbelief and doubt. Instead, give us the strength we need to fix our eyes on Jesus and to wait patiently for His salvation. Help us to be godly helpers who seek our husband’s good and Your glory.

Please forgive us for all those times when we have gone astray and even led our husbands astray. We repent of our selfishness and pride.

We lift our husbands before You. We pray that they will cast all of their cares onto You and have faith to believe that You care for them. Let them not grow weak-kneed or cowardly. Help them to stand strong against temptation, especially when that temptation comes from our own lips.

In the name of Jesus, our faithful Lord and Savior, we pray, Amen.

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A Prayer for your Husband’s Faith – 2025 Day 37 (Genesis 12)

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Read Through the Bible in 2 Years: Genesis 12

“Now the LORD said to Abram, “Go from your country and your kindred and your father’s house to the land that I will show you.”

– Genesis 12:1 ESV

Abram, too, finds his way into the Hall of Faith in Hebrews 11, just as Abel and Noah whom we already read about this year.

“By faith Abraham obeyed when he was called to go out to a place that he was to receive as an inheritance. And he went out, not knowing where he was going.”

– Hebrews 11:8 ESV

In reading Genesis 12, I wanted to either focus on Abram’s failure to protect his beautiful wife from the advances of the Pharaoh or on Abram’s faith in God when he chose to go out to an unknown land.

But, instead, I’m going to choose Door #3.

Here it is: In spite of Abram’s shortcomings and failures, he is who God chose and called to be the father of His people.

Like Noah, a righteous man, chosen by God for a great purpose who became drunk with wine shortly after surviving the worldwide flood, Abram obeyed God in going out to this new place, yet he gives way to fear.

Like we read in Ephesians 2:8-10, “For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.”

From Abel to Noah to Abram to me and my husband, each one of us have been saved by our faith, not by our works. Yet our faith will lead us to do works of faith, whether in offering good sacrifices, or building big boats, or going out to foreign lands, or writing blogs one-day-at-a-time. May we all walk faithfully with our God.

Let’s pray together.

Heavenly Father,

Thank You for the precious gift of faith. You did not choose me because of any deed that I had done. In fact, You cast Your eyes and Your love upon me while I was Your enemy. You called me and chose me and drew me and put faith into me … and all I can say is THANK YOU!

Lord, I pray for my husband to hear You loud and clear. Help him to be strong and courageous and not to be afraid. Help him to resist the temptation to take the easy way out. Father, I pray that You will be faithful to complete the good work that You have begun in him. Direct his steps and protect him from the schemes and lies of the evil one. Give him the strength and wisdom to follow You. Help him to know Your Word and hear Your voice as You lead him.

Father, help us as wives to submit to our husbands, not to fear anything that is frightening. Encourage us to sit daily at Your feet, that we might trust You when life is scary. Help us to keep a careful watch over our mouths and our minds, thinking and speaking the truth in love. Make us godly helpmeets, doing good to our husbands all the days of his life, so that his heart can trust us and he will have no lack of gain.

Lord, we submit to You and Your will for our lives. We will go where you send us, when you send us, trusting that Your ways and thoughts are always better than ours.

In the Good and Sovereign Name of Jesus we pray, Amen.

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Learning from the Lives of Cain and Abel – 2025 Day 32 (Genesis 4-5)

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Read through the Bible in 2 years: Psalm 1, Genesis 4-5

We don’t really know exactly why God accepted Abel’s offering, but not Cain’s, but I think Hebrews 11:4 gives us some insight.

“By faith Abel offered to God a more acceptable sacrifice than Cain, through which he was commended as righteous, God commending him by accepting his gifts. And through his faith, though he died, he still speaks.”

– Hebrews 11:4 ESV

Oftentimes, we want to do what seems right to us, rather than doing what God has said. We think, “What’s wrong with eating the fruit of that tree? It looks fine to me.” Or we think, “Why can’t I give God this fruit, I am a farmer after all?”

Yet, faith trusts God. Faith trusts that what God has said is right. Faith believes that God is good and all-knowing and that all His ways are right.

And like Hebrews 11:6 (explaining more about Abel and other men and women of faith) says,

“Without faith it is impossible to please Him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who seek him.”

– Hebrews 11:6

Who are we seeking? Whose reward do we desire? Who are we trying to please? Are we pursuing our own pleasure and comfort or are we pursuing the Lord?

It’s like the words of Christ that we read in John, “Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life. If anyone serves Me, he must follow Me; and where I am, there will My servant be also. If anyone serves Me, the Father will honor him.” (John 12:25-26 ESV)

When we’re living for the Lord, we must expect the world to hate, rather than love, us  In fact, Abel’s life is an example for us. “We should not be like Cain, who was of the evil one and murdered his brother. And why did he murder him? Because his own deeds were evil and his brother’s righteous. Do not be surprised, brothers, that the world hates you.”  (1 John 3:12-13 ESV)

Cain said to the LORD, “My punishment is greater than I can bear.”

– Genesis 4:13 ESV

Were you taken aback when you read this? I was. When I first read this, I thought, “No, Cain, your punishment is much too light! You killed your brother. You deserve to be killed.” (In fact, Genesis 9:6 says just that.)

But as I’ve pondered it more, I see the foreshadowing of Christ bearing our sins, from the largest to the smallest. Cain deserved death for his sin, and though I’ve never murdered anyone physically, I deserve death for my sins, too. “For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 6:23 ESV)

I couldn’t bear the punishment for my sins any more than Cain (or anyone else) could, yet Christ bore our punishment in our place, that we might be forgiven by a just judge.

“[Jesus] committed no sin, neither was deceit found in his mouth. When he was reviled, he did not revile in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten, but continued entrusting himself to him who judges justly. He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, that we might die to sin and live to righteousness. By his wounds you have been healed.”

– 1 Peter 2:22-24 ESV

Let’s pray.

Heavenly Father,

We come to You with hearts of thanksgiving for Your grace that You have lavished on us. We confess the hateful thoughts that we have had in our hearts toward men and women created in your image. We confess that we have often been jealous of others – The relationships they have, the talents they have, the possessions they have, even the faith they have. We confess we have often gone our own way rather than trusting Your character and Your Word.

We thank You for sending Jesus Christ, the only perfect sin substitute, the Lamb of God who was slain for the sins of the world, including me.We humbly ask You to forgive us and cleanse us through the blood of Christ that was shed for us.

Please, Heavenly Father, give us the strength and wisdom that we need to live like Christ – not repaying wrong with wrong, not repaying reviling with reviling, but overcoming evil with good. Help us to entrust ourselves to You, the only one who judges justly. We pray that our lights would shine brightly – even when the world is yelling at us to turn our lights out. May we shine brightly for You.

In the holy and merciful name of Jesus we pray, Amen.

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Craftiness and Blame-shifting – 2025 Day 31 (Genesis 3)

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Read through the Bible in 2 years: Proverbs 31, Genesis 3

My, my, how quickly things change! God creates a very good universe and in steps that crafty, cunning, shrewd snake, the devil. Like we read in John, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy… He was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks out of his own character, for he is a liar and the father of lies” (John 10:10, 8:44 ESV).

While God speaks for man’s good, the serpent speaks for our harm.

The blame-shifting begins as soon as God speaks to Adam. Adam blames the woman, but also subtly blames God saying, “The woman whom You gave to be with me, she gave me fruit of the tree and I ate.” (Genesis 3:12) Eve then blames the serpent for her disobedience. (Genesis 3:13) Sadly, I relate all too well to this struggle. It is easier to blame others than accept responsibility for our own actions.

We need to be careful not to shift blame to other people, whether our husband, our children, the cashier at the grocery store, the customer service representative on the phone. Whoever. Likewise, we need to be careful not to shift blame to our circumstances. I was hungry. I was tired. I’d a long day. It was “that time of the month.” Whatever.

Adam and Eve may have spoken the truth, but their hearts were proud and stubborn. Yes, Eve did ___. Yes, the serpent did ___. Yes, your husband ____. Yes, your child ___. Yes, the driver in front of you ___.

Those blame-shifting thoughts
and words may be true, but they are not helpful or humble.

Instead, let’s accept responsibility for our own sin, confess it to God, and repent of it. Don’t forget that repentance is more than just feeling remorse (feeling sorry that you did something bad). True repentance involves turning away from evil and turning your face toward God.

And, don’t forget what we read in 1 John 1:9-10 ESV, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us.” When we repent, we can be sure of God’s loving forgiveness.

Our choices (forgiven or not) still have consequences. Adam and Eve still had to leave the garden. They still had to face death. Yet, God is so full of grace and love.  He Himself made garments to clothe Adam and Eve, and when we surrender our lives to Him, He promises to clothe us in pure white garments through faith in Jesus Christ who shed His blood to cleanse us of our sin.

For further study – read Romans 5:12-21; Romans 6:23; Revelation 3:5, 18 and Revelation 19:7-9.

Will you pray with me?

Heavenly Father, We don’t want to be like that crafty snake. We don’t want to be deceivers or blame shifters. Please help us to accept responsibility for our sinful thoughts, attitudes, words and actions.

Thank you for sending Your only son, Jesus Christ, to pay the price for our sin, shedding His blood that we could be forgiven.

We confess to You how often we have chosen to follow our own selfish desires instead of following Your clear commands. Please help us to be wise in what is good and innocent in what is evil.

Help us to trust You and lean not on our own understanding, but to acknowledge You in all of our ways. We pray that You would direct our steps in a way that brings You honor and glory and brings good to those around us.

It is in the holy and righteous name of Jesus Christ, our Savior and Lord, that we pray, Amen

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The Gift of Being Created to be a Helper – 2025 Day 30 (Genesis 1-2)

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Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Proverbs 30; Genesis 1-2

I like to read Genesis one and two together because I see Genesis chapter two as an expansion of the account of the creation of man in chapter 1. There’s so much in these two chapters that I read both of them together, two days in a row.

Then the LORD God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.”

Now out of the ground the LORD God had formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name. The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him.

So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. And the rib that the LORD God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man.

Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.”

Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

– Genesis 2:18-24 ESV

God saw that it was not good for Adam to be alone, so He wanted to give Adam a helper who was fit for him. Not just any helper would do. He didn’t just need the strength of an ox or the beauty of a peacock or the loyalty of a dog. No, Adam needed a suitable helper, designed especially for man, and so God gave him a woman.

Being a helper is a gift to both the man and the woman. The man needs the woman … And the woman needs the man. They both have been given very important jobs.

God always has such perfect timing. When I initially wrote this devotional in January of 2023, I was visiting my parents hundreds of miles away from my husband, and I thought about how much my husband misses me when I’m gone. Yes, he misses me cooking and cleaning for him. Yes, he misses me making his morning coffee. Whether he missed them or not, I knew he needed my help in the little reminders I give and the times I’m an extra set of hands in the projects he’s working on. But I was especially struck by the thought that what he misses most is my company, simply having someone to talk to and share life with.

It is good to be needed and missed.

It’s a blessing to be created to be a helper.

Now, in 2025, as I reflect again on Genesis 1-2, my husband and I just celebrated our 30th anniversary, our daughter just got engaged, and our youngest son is preparing to graduate from homeschooling through high school and go away to college this fall.

I’m again reminded how careful we most be to not allow our children to take our husband’s place. Children are made from the seed of their father, not from his rib … or yours.

Children are created to
leave their parents,
but husbands and wives are created to become one flesh until they are parted by death.

Sisters, don’t leave your husband in the dust while you’re attending to your babies. Those babies are going to grow up and move away, but your husband will be by your side for the rest of his life. He needs you, and you need to be needed. Make sure you keep your children and your husband in their rightful places in your hearts, minds, and lives.

I speak from personal experience. This is hard, but it can be done. Here are a few ideas I’ve learned (and am still learning) over my 30 years of marriage.

  • Schedule regular dates with your husband to keep those flames of friendship burning.
  • Look for something small that you can do to serve your husband every day – make him a cup of coffee or write him a little note or send him a text over lunch.
  • Express to your husband (and others) how grateful you are for him. Let them know how much they mean to you and how much you value them.
  • Keep a careful watch over your thought life. Complaining thoughts turn into complaining attitudes and complaining words. Nothing works more powerfully against your marriage than having a complaining spirit. When those thoughts (true though they might be) come into your mind, grab hold of them and replace them with the truths of hope and grace found at the foot of the cross.
  • Make praying for your husband a priority. Ask God to bless him and guide him. Check out this video to a wonderful prayer for your husband – from his head to his feet.

Heavenly Father,

Thank You so much for the gift that my husband is. Thank You for making me his helper. Thank You for making him such that he needed me. And thank You for making me fit for him.

Help me to recognize the blessing it is to be needed. I pray that I would make my husband a priority in my life. Help me to do him good and not harm all the days of his life. Help me to submit myself willingly and cheerfully to him, and to trust You, Lord, in the process.

Father, help me not to grow weary of doing good and to trust that in due season I will reap a harvest if I do not lose heart.

I pray that You would bless my husband with every spiritual blessing according to the riches of Your glory in Christ Jesus. I pray that You would take care of him physically, spiritually, and emotionally. Give him the strength and wisdom that he needs to lead our family and give him the humility that he needs to turn to You in his weakness.

I pray also for my married children and their spouses. Make the men servant leaders and the women responsive helpers. Give them a deep love for Your Word and Your church. Show them their need for a savior and grant them the humility they need to live daily in love with the sinner they married.

I pray also for my not-yet-married children and their someday-spouses. Help them to guard their hearts, for they are the wellspring of life. Protect them, body, mind, and spirit, for Your glory and their good. May these days and years be used to prepare them to be a humble leader or a humble helper, to be fit for one another and for Your kingdom.

In the good and gracious name of Jesus Christ , my Savior and my Lord, I pray.

Amen.

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Loving and Hating – 2025 Day 24 (1 John 2-3)

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Read through the Bible in 2 years: Proverbs 24; 1 John 2 and 3

“Whoever says he is in the light and hates his brother is still in darkness. Whoever loves his brother abides in the light, and in him there is no cause for stumbling. But whoever hates his brother is in the darkness and walks in the darkness, and does not know where he is going, because the darkness has blinded his eyes.”

– 1 John 2:9-11 ESV

Love is an emotion as well as an action. Love wants for someone’s good while hate wants for someone’s harm. You might say that you love someone while you practice deceit and cunning. You might say that you love someone while turning a deaf ear to their cries for help or even leading them astray. People say all kinds of things in the name is love, but really that love is simply hate wrapped in shiny paper. True love desires for the other person’s health, wholeness, and holiness, even when it hurts. Even when it’s inconvenient. Even when it’s messy.

“Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride of life—is not from the Father but is from the world.”

– 1 John 2:15-16 ESV

At its very essence, love of the world boils down to love of self. The love of the world is the love of selfish desires: comfort, safety, and pleasure.

Truth be told, my love of the world rarely looks like God’s love of the world, that John 3:16 love, “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.” My love of the world usually looks a whole lot more like my love of me and my own good, not my neighbor’s good and not my Lord’s good. Father, forgive me.

When my life is full of loving me, there’s no room left to love my Heavenly Father or my neighbor. To truly love my Heavenly Father, I must put His glory and His commands over my own fleeting pleasures. To truly love my neighbor, I have to put his well-being over my own, and that takes Holy Spirit power! I can never do it in my own strength. I must abide faithfully in Him and allow His Word and His Spirit flow through me.

Won’t you pray with me?

Heavenly Father,

We want Your glory and majesty to fill the earth. Make us Your vessels. We want to walk in the light as You are in the light. We want to love our neighbor as ourselves. We want to love others as Christ loved us.

But, Father, we can’t do it on our own.

Please forgive us for how far and how often we have gone astray. We have loved the world and the things in the world, instead of loving You and loving our neighbor. We have loved ourselves and hated our brothers.

We repent of our sins. We turn to You, knowing that You are our only hope in life and death. Thank You for the forgiveness and grace available to us through the blood of Christ. Thank You for Your power and guidance available to us through the Holy Spirit.

We need You every hour. We cry out to You and ask for Your help and we know that You hear us.

Thank You! Thank you! Thank you! By the perfect righteousness of Christ we come to You.

Amen

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A New Commandment – 2025 Day 13 (John 13)

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Read through the Bible in 2 years: Proverbs 13, John 13

“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.”

John 13:34 ESV

When Jesus knew that His hour had come to give up His life and return to his Father, He didn’t look to a bucket list of “Top 100 Things to Do Before You Die.” No, he washed His disciples’ feet. The most important thing to Him before His death was to leave an example of true love for His followers.

He gives them this “new commandment” – a very old commandment actually, but made even more difficult by the addition of “JUST AS I HAVE LOVED YOU.” It’s really, really hard to love your neighbor as yourself. (Mark 12:31) This takes supernatural power. But to love others sacrificially as Jesus did – washing your friends’ feet, your students’ feet, even your betrayer’s feet – and even to lay down your own life for someone else, this is impossible apart from being born again, having a new will and new power working in you. (Philippians 2:13)

Will you please pray with me for the Lord to give you this strength?

Heavenly Father, I confess to you how hard it is for me to love others as myself, how totally impossible it is for me to love them as you have loved me. Help me to remember that what is impossible for man is possible for God. Nothing is impossible for You. I need You to give me both the strength and the desire!

Help me to remember that You loved me while I was a sinner, your enemy. You ran after me while I was running away from You. Help me to feel – and express – that kind of love for others, even when I don’t feel like it. Help me to pursue others like You pursued me.

Help me to consider others more highly than myself. Help me to serve my family and my friends, people who love me. Help me to serve my children and my students, people who are under my authority. Help me to serve the stranger and alien and even my enemy, remembering that You loved me when I was a stranger and alien and even Your enemy.

I need Your help. Please. In the strong and kind name of Jesus my Savior and Lord, I pray, Amen.

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Mark 11: Forgiven

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Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Mark 11

And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.”

Mark 11:25 ESV

Heavenly Father, Thank You for Your grace and mercy and forgiveness. You have forgiven me, not because I deserve it, not because I’ll never do it again, but because of the blood of Jesus shed on my behalf. Help me to trust You more, to trust that You are good and faithful, that You are sovereign Lord over heaven and earth. And as I trust You, help me to forgive others, to lay them once and for all at Your feet, to stop punishing them myself and let Your justice be enough. In the Name of Jesus Christ, my Savior and Judge  and Ruler, I pray. Amen.

A Prayer for My Son and His Future Wife. Thoughts from 1 Kings.

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Read through the Bible in 2 Years: 1 Kings 11

Heavenly Father, Your Word warns us again and again about the importance of having a godly wife. I pray that my son will heed those warnings. Guard his heart from those who want to steal it away from You. Turn his eyes away from worthless things and focus them on Your commands. Help him to treasure Your Words that he will not be tempted to go astray. Give my son divine discernment and patience, that he will be led by Your Spirit around the pitfalls laid by the enemy of our soul who seeks to trap him in his clutches. Guide him to a woman who loves You with all her heart, soul, mind, and strength, that the two of them would be better together than they could be apart, that 1 + 1 would be 3 squared. Make the two of them a cord of three strands that cannot be easily broken with you that center strand of steel that they will both cling to through good times and bad, plenty and want, sickness and health, until their last day on earth. For Your glory and his good I pray in the mighty name of Jesus Christ. Amen

Two Becoming One

As God Adds to Our Blessings, What Do We Do With Them? Thoughts from Hosea.

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Read Through the Bible in 2 Years: Hosea 9-10

Israel is a luxuriant vine that yields its fruit.

The more his fruit increased, the more altars he built;

as his country improved, he improved his pillars.

Hosea 10:1 ESV

God has given us every good gift to enjoy. He has blessed us with heat and sunshine and air to breathe. He has given us homes to live in and children to fill them. He has blessed us with abundant food and wealth. He has given us eyes to see, ears to hear, and minds to comprehend. Yet, what do we do with all of these gifts?

Do we enjoy them or neglect them? Do we praise Him or take credit for them?

When was the last time you thanked God for the children sitting around your table or clinging to your legs?

When was the last time you took a leisurely walk outside and thanked God for the blue sky and warm sun?

It seems that the more full our homes and lives become, the less interested we become in the Lord. Why is that?

Why would the Lord bless us with more if it will just turn our hearts away from Him? It is His mercy that keeps us begging for our daily bread. It is His mercy that makes us hunger for the gift of a child. It is His mercy that keeps us dependent on Him for a roof over our head and money in our bank account.

My word for 2024 is “Enough.” Is the Lord enough? YES! He is! Has He given me enough? YES! Yes, He has! My cup overflows with His love and grace and goodness.

Heavenly Father, Help me to be faithful in the little things that You might entrust to me more things. Help me to be thankful for every single little gift, the birds that sing before the sun rises, the wind that blows gently through the trees, the sound of trickling water. Thank You for giving me eyes that see and ears that hear. Thank You for giving me a mind and heart that know You. Thank You. You are enough. You are more than I need. In the Name of Jesus Christ who redeemed and delivered me. Amen.

All Things Wise and Wonderful