Category: Parenting and Motherhood

The Dangers of Pride and Self-Sufficiency

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Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Deuteronomy 7-9

Moses had some words of wisdom for the Israelites before they entered the Promised Land. He warned them not to turn away from God saying to themselves, “My power and the might of my hand have gotten me this wealth,” (Deuteronomy 8:17) and “It is because of my righteousness that the LORD has brought me in to possess this land.” (Deuteronomy 9:4) He was worried that when they were full and had built nice houses to live in and had plenty of sheep, cattle, gold, silver and children, they would “forget the Lord your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of slavery.” (Deuteronomy 8:14b)

This was a very real danger for the Israelites, and it’s a very real danger for us.

Beware, sister, lest you forget that God chose you while you were yet a sinner, an enemy of the gospel. Beware, sister, lest you fall away and trust in your own righteousness rather than Christ’s. Beware, sister, lest you no longer see your need for the Lord’s salvation and provision.

Heed the words to the church in Laodicea from Revelation 3:17-18

For you say, I am rich, I have prospered,
and I need nothing,
not realizing that you are wretched, pitiable,
poor, blind, and naked.
I counsel you to buy from me gold refined by fire,
so that you may be rich,
and white garments so that you may clothe yourself and the shame of your nakedness may not be seen, and salve to anoint your eyes, so that you may see.”

Revelation 3:17-18

I was reminded of something I wrote about earlier this week about the roadblocks that stand in the way of us teaching our children. One stumbling block that I hadn’t thought about at the time, though, was pride. Sometimes we feel like we don’t need to teach our children because we think, “They’re good kids. They know God’s Word. They don’t really need me to teach them.” In our self-sufficiency, we become lazy parents. We take pride in our children’s accomplishments, thinking that we must be really great parents to have produced such great kids, rather than humbly acknowledging God’s mercy toward them and us.

Dear friends, the Lord did not choose you because you were mighty or lovely or powerful or smart or good. In fact, you weren’t any of those things before, and you’re not any of those things now. Sure, you might be more kind or beautiful or smart or religious than your husband or sister or neighbor, but compared to God we are all filthy and wretched.

  • Compared to the wisdom of God, you are a fool.
  • Compared to the kindness of God, you are a selfish beast.
  • Compared to the power of God, you are nothing more than a grasshopper perched precariously on a blade of grass.

Moses had never read my favorite Bible verse, Romans 5:8, “But God shows His love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us,” yet, the Holy Spirit inspired him to write Deuteronomy 7:6-8. God is unchanging, sovereign, and good. Trust in Him and Him alone.

“The LORD your God has chosen you to be a people for his treasured possession, out of all the peoples who are on the face of the earth. It was not because you were more in number than any other people that the LORD set his love on you and chose you, for you were the fewest of all peoples, but it is because the LORD loves you and is keeping the oath that he swore to your fathers, that the LORD has brought you out with a mighty hand and redeemed you from the house of slavery, from the hand of Pharaoh king of Egypt.”

Deuteronomy 7:6b-8 ESV

Let’s pray.

Heavenly Father, thank You for Your mercy and grace. Thank You for Your forgiveness. Thank You for the peace that You have given to me, redeeming me and bringing me into Your family and Your kingdom. I pray that You would keep me humble. You have given me so much. You have anointed my head with oil again and again. My cup indeed overflows. Keep me on my knees. Help me to seek You and You only. Help my heart to truthfully say, “There is nothing on earth that I desire besides you.” Let me not boast in anything save in the cross of Christ. You are all I need. In the Name of Jesus Christ, my Treasure and Savior, I pray. Amen.

You are my All in All – Maranatha

Teaching your Children – Part 2

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Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Deuteronomy 5-6

And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart.

You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.

You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.

Deuteronomy 6:6-9 ESV

Yesterday I wrote about having a daily time in prayer and the Word with your children. Today I want to write about teaching your children as you go about your days, talking about what the Lord has taught you as you do whatever the day has for you to do.

I like to begin my days with my own time in the Word. This means early mornings, but it’s so worth it. Rising before the sun starts my day off right and helps to set my mind on heavenly things. Then, as I go throughout my day – teaching English online, vacuuming, washing dishes, doing schoolwork with my son, going for a walk in my neighborhood – my thoughts often return to what I read that morning or that week.

In praying about what to write today, I was reminded of Luke 6:45b ESV, “Out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.” If my heart is full of grumbling, my mouth will be full of complaints, but if my heart is full of gratitude and wisdom, my mouth will be, too. I can’t speak of the Lord’s goodness, if I don’t in my heart believe that He is good. I know how much I need the Lord to renew my heart and mind daily. I know how prone to wander that I am. If I miss even one day with my Savior, I can feel it in my spirit.

She opens her mouth with wisdom,
and the teaching of kindness
is on her tongue.

Proverbs 31:26 ESV

The only way for your tongue to speak wisdom and kindness is for your heart to be full of the wisdom and kindness found in the Word of God. Start there for yourself, and let your heart overflow into your children as you rise and sit and walk and lie down day after day. Just like you would casually tell your children about what you bought that day at the store or about that friend you ran into that day at work, share with your children what you learned that day in the Word or in the circumstances of your daily life.

Your children need the wisdom that comes from living. Let your successes – and your failures – guide them to the path of life in Jesus.

Let’s pray.

Heavenly Father, help me to sit at Your feet each and every day, day after day soaking in Your Word and Your presence. Draw me close to You that my life and my mouth may overflow with love for my children. May my mouth be full of wisdom and kindness. May my eyes be gentle and bright. May my ears be attentive and compassionate. May my mind be fixed on things that are above and not on the things of this earth. Help me to remember that this earth and its tribulations are passing away, while the unseen things are eternal and weighty. Fill my heart with Your love. Fill my mouth with Your Word and Your words. Help me to live for what matters. Give me the strength to love my children as myself, to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger. Make me Your mouthpiece, teaching truth diligently to my children – from the time they awake until they go to sleep – for the glory of Your Name and for the good of Your kingdom. In the Name of Jesus Christ, my Savior and my Lord I pray. Amen.

A Prayer for Diligent Parenting

Teaching your Children

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Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Deuteronomy 4

“Only take care, and keep your soul diligently, lest you forget the things that your eyes have seen, and lest they depart from your heart all the days of your life. Make them known to your children and your children’s children.’

Deuteronomy 4:9-10 ESV

There is truly no greater joy in my daily life than sitting next to my son, reading and discussing the Bible together. If God has given you children, He wants you to teach those children about Him. Is this a struggle for you? It was for me. I’d love to help.

First, I suggest you consider what roadblocks are getting in your way.

  • Are you or your children too busy? Do you not have even thirty minutes a day together at home?
  • Do you have a tense, angry, disrespectful relationship with your children? Do you struggle even just being in the same room with each other or talking for more than a few minutes?
  • Do you not have your own personal time in prayer and the Word?
  • Is your husband opposed to you sharing your faith or teaching your children about God?

Different struggles have different solutions.

  • If you’re overcommitted with extra curricular activities, or spending too much time on schoolwork, housework, or office work, you’ve got to find a way to rearrange your schedule. Get up earlier. Drop a club. Turn off the TV or put away the phone.
  • If you can’t stand your children and they can’t stand you, humbly approach them and ask for a do-over. Cut out of your life what’s stealing your focus and pay attention to your children. Play some games together. Cook a nice meal together. Listen. Hang out. Speak encouraging words. Show them that they matter to you. Ask them how you can pray for them and then do it.
  • If you’re not having your own time with the Lord, why would your children? Don’t expect from others what you’re not doing yourself. Your children won’t see the need for prayer and Bible study if you don’t. Reading the Bible isn’t a school subject. It’s an intimate, genuine, personal relationship with the author of the book.
  • If your husband truly has forbidden you from speaking to your children about God and your faith, this is a very difficult subject. Pray, sister, pray. Humbly petition the Lord to change your husband’s heart. Follow the words of 1 Peter 3 and have a gentle, quiet, meek spirit toward your husband and watch what the Lord does. Get help from your local church body leaders and look for open doors.

After considering the roadblocks and seeking to overcome them, then you’ve got to just start. There will never be a perfect time. Satan will try to keep you discouraged and flustered until the day your kids are grown and gone.

Pick a song and sing together. Singing helps reorient your mind and heart to the Lord.

Next, pray for the Lord to speak during your time together in the Word.

Then read a few verses or even a chapter or two together. If your child can read, let them read. Encourage them. Praise them. Sit next to them. Look them in the eyes and listen to every word they want to share.

After you read together, ask them what their favorite verse was and tell them yours. Have them write that verse down in a journal or in the margin of their Bible, and you do the same.

Finally, pray together. Pray for each other. Pray for your neighbors and friends and family. Pray for your country and for our world. Enjoy your time together. Make it the highlight of your day.

Dear friends, I don’t want to guilt you into teaching your children about God. Rather, I want to come alongside you and encourage you. God is good and He wants to bless you through your children and bless your children through you. I’d love to hear how it goes!

Making No Provision for the Flesh

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Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Romans 13:8-14

Owe no one anything, except to love each other, for the one who loves another has fulfilled the law.

For the commandments, “You shall not commit adultery, You shall not murder, You shall not steal, You shall not covet,” and any other commandment, are summed up in this word: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”

Love does no wrong to a neighbor; therefore love is the fulfilling of the law.

Besides this you know the time, that the hour has come for you to wake from sleep. For salvation is nearer to us now than when we first believed. The night is far gone; the day is at hand. So then let us cast off the works of darkness and put on the armor of light. Let us walk properly as in the daytime, not in orgies and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and sensuality, not in quarreling and jealousy.

But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to gratify its desires.

Romans 13:8-14 ESV

What do I think about night after night, day after day? Am I thinking about loving and obeying God or loving and obeying my own fleshly lusts?

Before coming to faith in Christ, sexual immorality was a normal part of my life, but by God’s grace those chains have been broken. But what about quarrelling and jealousy? What about selfishness and gluttony? What about laziness and pride?

Am I putting on Jesus Christ every morning, clothing myself with His righteousness? Or am I still walking in the lusts of my flesh?

Am I loving the Lord by loving my neighbor? Or do I simply “love me some ME“?

Again, the Word brings conviction and forces me to ask hard questions about how I’m living and where my treasure and pleasure are found – in Christ or in created things, in the Word or in the World?

Heavenly Father, You are my greatest treasure. Your Word is both convicting and comforting. I need Your help to live a pure, holy life. Please speak deep into my heart, that I would live for You and not for me, that I would follow You rather than my flesh. I know that Your ways are good and good for me. Please help me to trust You moment by moment and walk in the obedience of faith. In the name of Jesus Christ, my Lord and my Savior. Amen.

Submission to Authorities

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Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Romans 13:1-7

Let every person be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those that exist have been instituted by God.

Therefore whoever resists the authorities resists what God has appointed, and those who resist will incur judgment. For rulers are not a terror to good conduct, but to bad.

Would you have no fear of the one who is in authority? Then do what is good, and you will receive his approval, for he is God’s servant for your good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for he does not bear the sword in vain. For he is the servant of God, an avenger who carries out God’s wrath on the wrongdoer.

Therefore one must be in subjection, not only to avoid God’s wrath but also for the sake of conscience. For because of this you also pay taxes, for the authorities are ministers of God, attending to this very thing. Pay to all what is owed to them: taxes to whom taxes are owed, revenue to whom revenue is owed, respect to whom respect is owed, honor to whom honor is owed.

Romans 13:1-7 ESV

Here in America I don’t often struggle with obeying our government authorities. I have found that most of their decisions are good. I should obey the speed limit and make a complete stop at a stop sign. I shouldn’t steal or murder or lie in court.

I’m allowed to freely teach my children all the ins and outs of our Christian faith. There is absolutely nothing preventing me from practicing my faith and teaching my children the Bible and all of its practices. Even as a homeschooling parent, my state’s rules allow me the freedom to choose any curriculum I believe that is appropriate for my child.

But what would I do if I lived in a nation that forbade such practices?

  • What if my country regulated what pastors were allowed to say from the pulpit?
  • What if my country said I wasn’t allowed to teach my children the Bible or take them to church?
  • What if my country banned prayer altogether, even a child’s silent prayer before eating lunch or taking a test?
  • What if my nation wouldn’t allow me to choose a private Christian school or Christian homeschooling curriculum?
  • What if my government banned homeschooling altogether?
  • When do I say, “I must obey God rather than men,” (Acts 5:29) and refuse to submit to the government’s orders?

Many of our brothers and sisters in other nations are already wrestling with these issues and I’m afraid many of these issues are already on the horizon for us as well. Please join me in prayer.

Heavenly Father, I thank You for the freedom that we in America have enjoyed for hundreds of years, the freedom to worship You in spirit and in truth, the freedom to teach our children the Word with passion and conviction. I pray that we would make the most of this freedom while we have it. I pray that we would not give up meeting together, and that we would teach our children diligently, verse by verse and precept upon precept. I pray for our brothers and sisters and other nations who do not enjoy these freedoms. I pray that You would give them wisdom about when to submit and when to refuse. Help them to have genuine love for their enemies and to overcome evil with good. Help them to remember that Your Word is their most powerful weapon. Please, Father, fight their battles for them and shelter them under Your wings. In the name of Jesus Christ I pray, Amen.

Overcoming Evil with Good

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Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Romans 12

12:9 ESV — Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good.

I love Romans 12. It’s so full of practical wisdom. I’d love to memorize all 21 verses in order, so I could remind myself of every ounce of it every time I needed it.

First, I need to be reminded that my body is a living sacrifice for God, that I might walk daily in the holy obedience of faith.

Second, I need to be reminded not to think of myself too highly, but to remember that my faith is a good gift from God, that I might serve Him by serving others in my teaching, exhortation, giving, leading, and serving.

And then, I need to be reminded that my love must be genuine and sincere, free from hypocrisy, that I would hate what is evil and cling to what is good. This reminds me of 1 Corinthians 13:6, Love “does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.” Our culture says that we should applaud others’ choices, no matter what they are, but our Lord says that genuine love HATES evil and LOVES good.

And finally, I need to be reminded how to treat those enemies that genuine love will make, that I am not to repay wrong with wrong, but to overcome evil with good.

Light and love are our secret weapons in the fight against the evil one
and those in his grasp.

Vengeance belongs to the Lord, not us. We are His servants, called to put on the full armor of God, to resist the devil and fight the good fight of faith. Let’s pray.

Heavenly Father, please help us to remember that we are Your soldiers, Your workmanship, Your children, Your servants, that we are in a battle between good and evil. Let us fight this battle well, with the sword of the spirit ready in our minds, mouths, and hands, overcoming evil with good by Your power at work in us. Let us not grow weary of doing good, knowing that at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not lose heart. In the Almighty and Good name of Jesus Christ we pray. Amen.

A Child of Promise

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Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Romans 9

Twenty-five years ago, in July of 1998, I found out I was pregnant with my second child. Our first daughter was two years old, and I was overjoyed that we were expecting again. Unfortunately, during a routine 12-week ultrasound, we discovered that our unborn son had a bladder obstruction. His bladder was as big as his head. This wasn’t good.

On September 10, the doctors attempted an in-utero procedure to place a stent to drain Tommy’s bladder into the amniotic sac, but the procedure was unsuccessful and four days later we found out that he had passed away in my womb.

When we first learned that Tommy had an obstructed bladder, I prayed for God to either heal him completely or take him quickly, but after losing him, I would have given anything for one more month or even one more day. I wanted to feel him move again in my empty womb anf see my belly grow big and round and full with him. I would have loved for him to grow big enough for me to bathe him and take his little handprints, even if I had had to do those things after he had died.

Friends, there is no better way or better time to lose your child. You are never ready for it. It all hurts.

But this devastating experience grew my faith exponentially. I leaned into the Lord and His Word like never before. I began praying and reading the Bible in earnest, and I learned to trust God like never before.

I ended up founding an online ministry and writing a book called A Child of Promise – part story, part Bible Study, part journal – for other moms and dads who found themselves in the position of carrying an unborn baby with a poor or fatal prognosis.

God used this pain not only for my own good, but also for the good of other hurting families. Like our reading in Romans 9, God is the trustworthy potter in each of our lives. He has mercy on those He wills, and He hardens those whom He wills. And all I can say is that I’m thankful for His sovereign, merciful hand that shaped both me and my son.

Heavenly Father, I know that You are good. I know that You are sovereign over heaven and earth. I trust You even when it’s hard. I pray for my hurting sisters. I pray that You will encourage them and fill them with Your supernatural peace that surpasses understanding. Be their calm in the storm. Hold their hand as they walk through the fire, and carry them when they can’t take one more step. I pray that Your Word would be a light to their feet and a light to their paths, pointing them straight to You. In the name of Jesus Christ I pray. Amen.

I Know – Big Daddy Weave

All Things Work Together for Good

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Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Romans 8:28-39

“And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.

For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those whom he predestined he also called, and those whom he called he also justified, and those whom he justified he also glorified.

What then shall we say to these things?

If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?

Who shall bring any charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies. Who is to condemn?

Christ Jesus is the one who died—more than that, who was raised—who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us.

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? As it is written, “For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.”

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

Romans 8:28-39 ESV

My grandmother didn’t like to sit still. She always found something to keep herself busy. If she was watching something on TV, she kept her hands busy with counted cross-stitch.

As a college graduation gift, Grandma Norma
gave me this cross-stitched picture of an
American Sign Language postage stamp.

When I was about ten years old, she taught me to cross-stitch. In the last thirty years, I’ve made a few things of my own and have really enjoyed the process. I’ve learned two big lessons:

  • Don’t judge the finished project until it’s finished. You can’t really see how it’s going to turn out until it’s all the way done.
  • A great finished product takes a great amount of time to finish.

And such is life.

There will be lots of bumps along the way. There will be times of fruitfulness and times of barrenness. There will be lots of happy times, but also plenty of storms. But we can trust that God sees the finished product and He’s still working.

Which reminds me of this song that my kids sang when they were little.

I am a Promise – Homecoming Kids / Gaither Music

A child’s life is a work in progress, but so are ours. And if you’re God’s child, then you can trust that the Lord will complete the work that He has begun in you. You can walk with confidence that He is carrying you in the palm of His hand, even when you can’t see Him working.

After my grandma died, my mom found this
darling bird that she had made. I added the
Bible verse and gave it to my granddaughter.

Hope and The Groanings of Childbirth

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Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Romans 8:18-27

Giving birth to my stillborn son, Tommy, was a completely different experience than giving birth to my living children, not because the physical pain was less but because there was no expectation of joy to come. It’s hard to watch a mother in obvious pain as she groans and struggles in the pains of labor and childbirth, but the pain she’s experiencing is not without hope. That mother has hope during her pain because she knows that in the end she will hold a precious little bundle of love in her arms.

Earlier this week I saw this definition of HOPE penned on a dry erase board in a friend’s kitchen. Desire plus expectation equals HOPE. Expectation without desire is merely drudgery. Desire without expectation is just wishful thinking. But expectation combined with desire puts fuel in our tanks and joy in our hearts. Hope enables us to keep pushing forward through the pain.

Dear sisters, take heart in Christ. There is something infinitely better than a pot of gold on the other side of the pains of this life. All of creation is groaning today, but everlasting joy is coming. In this world we do indeed have trouble but we can take heart because Jesus has overcome the world. He has triumphed over sin and death. If the Spirit of God dwells in you, then you can have total confidence that you will be raised from the dead, just as Christ was. This is our sure confidence and hope.

The Law is Good, but I’m a Two-Year-Old.

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Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Romans 7:7-25

If you’ve ever taken care of a 2-year-old, you’ll understand what I’m talking about here. You tell the child that they’re not allowed to have something or do something, and then that is exactly what they absolutely have to have or do. All too often the battle within my own heart looks way too much like my battles with my two-year-old grandchild.

  • No, Honey, you can’t have that knife. It’s dangerous. Put it down right now.
  • Oh, Sweetheart, I’m sorry, but you can’t go down the stairs by yourself. Grammy has to hold your hand. You might get hurt.
  • Well, Love, it’s time for bed. Grammy’s going to read you some books. You can pick three books for me to read. Only three. No, only three. Just three.

Why can’t I obey the Lord promptly, cheerfully, and completely? Why does He have to tell me the same thing time after time, day after day? Don’t I trust Him?

Heavenly Father, I know that You are good and kind. I know that Your Laws are for my good, to keep me safe. I want to bring You glory and honor. Please help me to trust and obey You with all my heart. In the Name of Jesus Christ I pray. Amen.