Category: Parenting and Motherhood

The Gift of Being Created to be a Helper

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Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Genesis 1-2

I like to read Genesis one and two together because I see Genesis chapter two as an expansion of the account of the creation of man in chapter 1. There’s so much in these two chapters that I read both of them together, two days in a row.

Then the LORD God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” 

Now out of the ground the LORD God had formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name. The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him. 

So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. And the rib that the LORD God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 

Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.”

Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh." - Genesis 2:18-24 ESV

God saw that it was not good for Adam to be alone, so He wanted to give Adam a helper who was fit for him. Not just any helper would do. He didn’t just need the strength of an ox or the beauty of a peacock or the loyalty of a dog. No, Adam needed a suitable helper, designed especially for man, and so God gave him a woman.

Being a helper is a gift to both the man and the woman. The man needs the woman … And the woman has been given a very important job.

In God’s perfect timing, I’m writing this as I’m visiting my parents hundreds of miles away from my husband. I can assure you, my husband misses me. Yes, he misses me cooking and cleaning for him. Yes, he misses me making his morning coffee. Whether he misses them or not, he needs my little reminders and extra set of hands. But I think he especially misses my company, having to talk to and share life with.

And this is a great blessing! It is good to be needed and missed.

We need to be so careful to not allow our children to take our husband’s place. Children are made from the seed of their father, not from his rib … or yours. Children are created to leave their parents, but husbands and wives are created to become one flesh until they are parted by death.

Sisters, don’t leave your husband in the dust while you’re attending to your babies. Those babies are going to grow up and move away, but your husband will be by your side for the rest of his life. He needs you and you need to be needed. Make sure you keep your children and your husband in their rightful places in your hearts, minds, and lives.

I speak from personal experience – this is hard, but it can be done. Here are a few ideas I’ve learned (and am still learning) over my 28 years of marriage.

  • Schedule regular dates with your husband to keep those flames of friendship burning.
  • Look for something small that you can do to serve your husband every day – make him a cup of coffee or write him a little note or send him a text over lunch.
  • Express to your husband (and others) how grateful you are for him. Let them know how much they mean to you and how much you value them.
  • Keep a careful watch over your thought life. Complaining thoughts turn into complaining attitudes and complaining words. Nothing works more powerfully against your marriage than having a complaining Spirit. When those thoughts (true though they might be) come into your mind, grab hold of them and replace them with the truths of hope and grace found at the foot of the cross.
  • Make praying for your husband a priority. Ask God to bless him and guide him. Check out this video to a wonderful prayer for your husband – from his head to his feet.

Let’s pray now.

Heavenly Father,

Thank You so much for the gift that my husband is. Thank You for making me his helper. Thank You for making him such that he needed me. And thank You for making me fit for him.

Help me to recognize the blessing it is to be needed. I pray that I would make my husband a priority in my life. Help me to do him good and not harm all the days of his life. Help me to submit myself willingly and cheerfully to him, and to trust You, Lord, in the process.

Father, help me not to grow weary of doing good and to trust that in due season I will reap harvest if I do not lose heart.

I pray that You would bless my husband with every spiritual blessing according to the riches of Your glory in Christ Jesus. I pray that You would take care of him physically, spiritually, and emotionally. Give him the strength and wisdom that he needs to lead our family. And give him the humility that he needs to turn to You in his weakness.

In the good and gracious name of Jesus I pray.

Amen.

When Your Children are Walking in Truth

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Read through the Bible in 2 Years: 2 John and 3 John

Once again John doesn’t sign his own name, but this time, he’s simply “the elder.” What a sweet title to give himself.

Once again John talks about TRUTH and LOVE – twin pillars on which the gospel rests. Jesus is the truth. The truth abides in the elect and will be with us forever (2 John 2). God’s grace, mercy, and peace will be with us in truth and love. (2 John 3).

"I rejoiced greatly to find some of your children walking in the truth, just as we were commanded by the Father." - 2 John 1:4 ESV
"I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth." - 3 John 1:4 ESV

John rejoiced greatly at the good news that the elder woman’s children were walking in the truth and that his own children were walking in the truth. What greater joy is there? Whether it’s the children I’ve raised in my own house, or children I’ve discipled in the faith, or grown women I’ve walked with and helped them grow, what JOY it is to watch them walk in truth!

Who are you discipling? Who are your children in the faith? Who are you watching grow and walk in truth?

Everyone should have someone who they can pour into. You don’t have to wait until you’re an elder like John. Learn a little, teach a little. The walk is always nicer when you have someone to share it with. You’ll be amazed at how much it blesses YOU, how much JOY you receive, when you’re teaching someone else. How can I help you?

Will you pray with me?

Heavenly Father,

We pray that You will use us to equip the body for the work of ministry. Help us to work together with arms linked as one to grow Your church. Help us to be disciple makers, scattering seeds where we go and helping those little seedlings grow into mighty trees of righteousness that bear much fruit.

We pray for those who are young in their faith and that those elders will come alongside them to encourage them and minister to them. We pray for those who are elders in the faith to not lose heart or quit the fight. Help them to finish the race well, pouring out the last drop of their lives in the service of their king.

We pray for the children that are still in our homes. Lord, strengthen us to strengthen them. Draw them into a living relationship with You that they will walk in truth and love to the glory of Your name.

In the Name of Jesus we pray,

Amen.

True Love

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Read Through the Bible in 2 Years: 1 John 3:1 – 5:20

I love reading 1 John just after reading the book of John. I can imagine “the disciple whom Jesus loved” writing this letter – a letter focused on the inseparable themes of truth and love, a letter that is not addressed to any specific person or church and that John did not personally sign his name to. Sounds like John, right? For more on this read my post about John 21.

Did you notice that I reread 1 John 3? I have found that it’s easy for me to forget the context of what is written, so it’s helpful to read the previous chapter, so I can better understand what’s being said. Do you ever do that, too?

John wanted his readers to BELIEVE in Jesus, the Christ, the One who took on flesh and conquered death for us – the ones whom He loved.

John wanted his readers to have CONFIDENCE in God’s love toward us, His children, so that we would be unafraid for that kind of perfect love casts out all fear.

Thank about what you just read in the book of John. Think about all that John had experienced first hand. John had seen Jesus walk on water with his own eyes. John had been an eyewitness to Jesus healing the sick and feeding the 5,000 with a few fish and loaves of bread.

John had heard Jesus teach with his own ears. John heard Jesus teach on the importance of forgiveness and mercy and John had heard Jesus condemn the fake faith of the Pharisees. And John had heard Jesus say, “A new commandment I give to you that you love one another; just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.” (John 13:35)

"Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another." - 1 John 4:7-11 ESV

Remember that John is a man with a nature like ours. He isn’t the God-man Jesus Christ. Yes, John had been given a special calling as an apostle. Yes, he had the unique gift of being inspired to write the scriptures. But John battled his flesh just like we do. Think about how hard it must have been for John to love impetuous Peter and former tax collector Matthew.

True love is sacrifice. True love is best expressed in loving the hard-to-love. So next time you’re struggling to love that irritating person at church or that aggravating coworker or disobedient child, remember the truth that God loved us while we were his enemies. This is love.

Let’s pray together,

Heavenly Father,

Thank You for Your love. Thank You for sending Your only Begotten Son, Jesus Christ, to live here on earth and to die in my place.

I pray that I will have complete confidence in Your love for me. You have made Your love evident, visible, manifest in sending Your own Son. Help me to love others with the love that You first showed to me.

In the Name of Jesus I pray, Amen.

A Prayer for God’s Dearly Loved Children

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Read through the Bible in 2 years: 1 John 2:18 – 1 John 4:6

"I write to you, not because you do not know the truth, but because you know it, and because no lie is of the truth." - 1 John 2:21 ESV
"But you have been anointed by the Holy One, and you all have knowledge.... But the anointing that you received from him abides in you, and you have no need that anyone should teach you. But as his anointing teaches you about everything, and is true, and is no lie—just as it has taught you, abide in him." - 1 John 2:20, 27 ESV
"See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are." 1 John 3:1a ESV
"He came to his own, and his own people did not receive him. But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God." John 1:11-12 ESV
"No one born of God makes a practice of sinning, for God’s seed abides in him; and he cannot keep on sinning, because he has been born of God." 1 John 3:9 ESV

Heavenly Father,

Please fill us and lead us by Your Holy Spirit, that we would know and live by the truth. Help us to discern truth from lies. Help us to turn to You when we need wisdom and knowledge, and to trust that You truly do abide in us.

You have made us Your children, by our faith in Your Son, Jesus Christ. We have been born anew and Your seed abides in us. Let us test our faith to see if we are truly in You. If we are not in You, please show that to us. But, Father, if we are Yours, then help us to be conformed into Your likeness. Let us not love merely in words or talk, but let us love in deed and truth.

Help us to live holy and godly lives in this present age, waiting for our blessed hope, the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior Jesus Christ. Keep us from bitterness, wrath, anger, malice, and envy. Give us clean hands and pure hearts to the Glory of Your Name.

In the matchless name of Jesus we pray, Amen.

Of Light and Darkness, Love and Hate

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Read through the Bible in 2 years: Psalm 12; Proverbs 2:16-22; 1 John 2:7-17

"Whoever says he is in the light and hates his brother is still in darkness. Whoever loves his brother abides in the light, and in him there is no cause for stumbling. But whoever hates his brother is in the darkness and walks in the darkness, and does not know where he is going, because the darkness has blinded his eyes." - 1 John 2:9-11 ESV

What is love? What is hate? Love is an emotion but it’s also an action. Love is wanting GOOD for someone while HATE wants harm for them.

Reading Psalm 12 and Proverbs 2 along with this passage, I thought of how much lying and adultery are really signs of hate … while honesty and integrity are marks of love. One might say that they love someone while their lips are speaking lies. One might say that they love someone while leading someone astray. But true love desires for the other person’s health, holiness, and well-being.

"Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride of life—is not from the Father but is from the world." - 1 John 2:15-16 ESV

At its very essence, the love of the world and the things of the world boil down to love of self, love of comfort, safety, and pleasure. My love of the world is nothing like God’s John 3:16 love – “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.” My love of the world looks a lot more like loving my own pleasure. The truth is that I love me some ME.

And when my eyes are full of loving me, there’s no room left to love my Heavenly Father or my neighbor. To truly love my Heavenly Father, I have to put His glory and His commands over my own fleeting pleasures. To truly love my neighbor, I have to put their well-being over my own, and that takes Holy Spirit power and strength! I can never do that in my own flesh.

Won’t you pray with me?

Heavenly Father,

We want Your glory and majesty to fill the earth. Make us Your vessels. We want to walk in the light as You are in the light. We want to love our neighbor as ourselves. We want to love others as Christ loved us.

But, Father, we can’t do it on our own.

Please forgive us for how far and how often we have gone astray. We have loved the world and the things in the world, instead of loving You and loving our neighbor. We have loved ourselves and hated our brothers.

We repent of our sins. We turn to You, knowing that You are our only hope in life and death. Thank You for the forgiveness and grace available to us through the blood of Christ. Thank You for Your power and guidance available to us through the Holy Spirit.

We need You every hour. We cry out to You and ask for Your help and we know that You hear us.

Thank You! Thank you! Thank you! By the perfect righteousness of Christ we come to You.

Amen

Prayer for a Child at College

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Read through the Bible in 2 years: John 17

How amazing it is to hear Jesus pray to His Holy, Righteous Father. Surely if He needed to pray, so do I! To read Jesus praying for His disciples, praying for the Father to protect them, encourages me to pray for those that I disciple, especially my children. 

"I do not ask that you take them out of the world, but that you keep them from the evil one." - John 17:15 ESV

Today my third-born child begins her second semester of college. I guess that’s why John 17:15 really jumped out at me. She has been homeschooled her whole life. Except for two years at a neighborhood church preschool and the occasional tutorial class, she has grown up under my watchcare. I have done my best to shelter her from the evil one, but I know that whether home or away, we all need the Lord to protect us from the schemes of the evil one.

Ultimately, the safest place any of us can be is in the Father’s will – whether that’s in your mama’s house or on the streets of Memphis, Tennessee or in a community college classroom.

Let’s pray together for our children.

Heavenly Father,

Thank You for the precious gift that it is to be a mother and the precious gift that this specific child is to me. Thank You for all the ways that I see Jesus in her. Thank You for her meek and gentle spirit which reminds me to be meek and gentle.

I pray that You will be glorified in her today. So many people never crack open a Bible or step foot in a church, so I pray that they will see You in her. Make her a city on a hill that points people to You. Make her an imitator of God as Your beloved child, walking in love as Christ loved her and gave Himself up for her. (Ephesians 5:1-2)

Protect her from the schemes and temptations of the evil one, so that Your light can shine brightly out of her like a million-watt lightbulb. Remind her of the Word that has been poured into her over the years she has spent in my home. Help her to hear your voice whispering – or shouting – in her head, “This is the way; walk in it.” Send Your Holy Spirit to be her counselor and guide, showing her which way to go and which way not to go. Send Your Holy Spirit to be her comforter and advocate, so that she will not give way to fear, but will remember, “I am a child of the Lord of heaven’s armies. What can man do to me?”

When she is tempted to hide her light under a bushel, convict her. Remind her that she belongs to You and that You are her ever-present help in time of need. Help her to call out to You and to trust You when she feels afraid or discouraged or lonesome. Help her to remember that You are always with her, and that You have promised to never leave her or forsake her.

In the good and righteous name of Jesus we pray,

Amen

Sorrow turned to Joy

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Read through the Bible in 2 years: John 16

"Truly, truly, I say to you, you will weep and lament, but the world will rejoice. You will be sorrowful, but your sorrow will turn into joy. When a woman is giving birth, she has sorrow because her hour has come, but when she has delivered the baby, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a human being has been born into the world. So also you have sorrow now, but I will see you again, and your hearts will rejoice, and no one will take your joy from you." - John 16:20-22 ESV

When I look at this picture, which was taken just moments after my youngest son was born, so many memories of that day flood back into my mind. After laboring into the wee hours of the night, I’d gotten my first epidural out of a crazy need for some rest, only to find myself overwhelmed by a intense feeling of panic when I couldn’t take a deep breath or feel my legs.

Yet, when that baby boy was delivered, all 8 pounds 15 ounces of him, I was even more overwhelmed by a feeling of ecstasy and joy, unexplainable to anyone who has never delivered a baby.

All the pain and exhaustion was worth it, the very instant that little boy drew his first breath and let out his first cry.

Just as friends try to prepare a new mom for the pain of labor and delivery, Jesus was trying to prepare His disciples for the great sorrow they would experience at His upcoming death and departure. An important part of that preparation that many experienced moms forget to share, is the immense JOY that you will experience after the pain is over.

Friends, listen to me, someday it will be worth it! Soon and very soon we are going to see the king! And there will be no more crying there. In this world we will indeed have tribulation, but we can take heart because Jesus has overcome the world.

We don’t need to try to take shortcuts to avoid the pain, hiding our lights under bushels so no one can see them, drowning our sorrows in Facebook and food. Instead, we can rejoice today because we know with certainty that these labor pains are only temporary and that they will all be worth it when we see our Savior face to face.

Will you please join me in prayer?

Heavenly Father,

You are our hope in life and death. Help us to fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfector of our faith. Help us to fix our minds on things that are above. Help us to number our hours and days, knowing that these times are in fact short and these trials are indeed light, in comparison to the eternal weight of glory that is to come.

We pray for those who are in the depths of sorrow today, who are at the peak of the incredible pain of labor, who can’t seem to make out that light at the end of this valley of despair. Father, please, be their comfort and help them to see Your everlasting arms carrying them and Your loving hand guiding them through this dark valley. Use us to encourage them. Help us to grieve with those who grieve just as deeply as we rejoice with those who rejoice.

We pray for those who are without hope today because they are without Christ. We pray that You will open their eyes and soften their hearts to the everlasting gospel of Jesus Christ who bore their punishment by His death on the cross. May today be their day of salvation, that many will rejoice with the angels over one lost sinner who repents!

In the holy name of Jesus we pray. Amen

Proving to be His Disciples

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Read through the Bible in 2 years: Psalm 10; Proverbs 2:1-15; John 15:1-17

"Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing." -  John 15:4-5 
"By this my Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and so prove to be my disciples." - John 15:8

Unfortunately, I didn’t inherit my mom’s green thumb and I’ve managed to kill every plant I’ve ever had unless they were planted outside and survived independent of any regular care. So, I was so happy when I received not one, but TWO, fake plants to put in the greenhouse window in my lovely sunroom.

But those plants won’t bear any fruit. They might look pretty and green, but they’ll never bear so much as a flower – not to mention bearing apples or strawberries. They’re really not good for anything other than looking nice. Remember, they’re fake plants.

According to Vine’s Expository Dictionary of New Testament Words, a disciple is someone who is not only a pupil but also an adherent and imitator of their teacher. Fake followers of Christ might look nice and green on the outside, but they aren’t following Christ’s commands. They’re not loving one another with the sacrificial love that Christ modeled for us. And they’re not bearing MUCH fruit, as true disciples, true followers of Jesus, will.

Do you see yourself in that last paragraph? If so, there’s hope for you. Attach yourself to the vine which is Jesus Christ, abide in Him and allow His words to abide in You. Ask the Lord to forgive you and to prune away whatever is holding you back. Repent of your sins, turning away from the world and turning toward the Lord in faith, and the life-giving sap of the Holy Spirit will fill your veins. Then, fruit will start popping out of you, maybe just a little at first – a little peace, a little patience, a little kindness … And as you cling to Him, He will bear MORE fruit in you, the fruit of good works done as you listen to the Master Gardener who died that you may have life.

Let’s pray together.

Heavenly Father,

Thank You for Your amazing grace that prunes away whatever is hindering us that we can be Your disciples and bear much fruit. Sometimes pruning hurts, and it seems like it would be easier to just be a fake plant, looking nice and green, but not bearing great bushels full of fruit.

We want to be disciples of Christ, living and loving like He lived and loved. Jesus obeyed you, His Heavenly Father, and we need to obey you, too. Give us the wisdom and strength to reject passivity and comfort, and instead to put out the necessary effort to send out tendrils that hold tightly to You that we may grow higher and fuller.

Help us to remember that we can do no good thing apart from You, that we need to abide in the vine of Jesus Christ. Help us to turn to You day after day, so that Your Word will abide in us and we can abide in You.

We love You, Father. You are a good gardener, taking good care of Your garden, giving us rain and sun and snow and clouds in due season. Help us to trust You more.

In the good and mighty name of Jesus Christ we pray, Amen.

A New Commandment

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Read through the Bible in 2 years: John 13

"A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another." John 13:34 ESV

When Jesus knew that His hour had come to give up His life and return to his Father, He didn’t look to a bucket list of “Top 100 Things to Do Before You Die.” No, he washed His disciples’ feet. The most important thing to Him before His death was to leave an example of true love for His followers.

He gives them this “new commandment” – a very old commandment actually, but made even more difficult by the addition of “JUST AS I HAVE LOVED YOU.” It’s really, really hard to love your neighbor as yourself. (Mark 12:31) This takes supernatural power. But to love others sacrificially as Jesus did – washing your friends’ feet, your students’ feet, even your betrayer’s feet – and even to lay down your own life for someone else, this is impossible apart from being born again, having a new will and new power working in you. (Philippians 2:13)

Will you please pray with me for the Lord to give you this strength?

Heavenly Father, I confess to you how hard it is for me to love others as myself, and even how impossible it is for me to love others as you have loved me. Help me to remember that what is impossible for man is possible for God. Nothing is impossible for you. I can do this because you give me strength.

Help me to remember that You loved me while I was a sinner, your enemy. You ran after me while I was running away from you.

Help me to feel that kind of love for others and to express that kind of love toward others. Help me to pursue others like you pursued me. Help me to serve others like you served me. Help me to see the need of other people as greater than my own need.

Jesus, you are my perfect example of being a servant. Help me to consider others more highly than myself. Help me to serve my family and my friends, people who love me. Help me to serve my children and my students, people who are under my authority. Help me to serve the stranger and alien and even my enemy, remembering that you loved me when I was a stranger and alien and even Your enemy.

In the strong and kind name of Jesus, I pray, Amen.

Happy Children’s Day

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In China, June 1 every year is Children’s Day. Here in the U.S., it seems like every day is Children’s Day. 😆

Have you ever heard the phrase, “We’re all God’s children?” It’s a pretty popular saying and somewhat accurate in that we are all God’s creation, or that we are all created in the image of God. Every man, woman, and child, born or unborn, has been created by God, after the image of God, for the intentional purpose of God. In that way, yes, we’re all God’s children.

But, today, as I was reading Ephesians 2, verses 2 and 3 jumped out at me. They say that we were all once by nature sons of disobedience and children of wrath. Verses 4-10 go on to explain that because of God’s rich mercy and love and grace, we have been saved from His wrath by faith in His Son, Jesus.

In order to be God’s children, we must be born again and be made new by the Holy Spirit. In order to call on God as our Father, we must be adopted as His sons and daughters.

I pray that today, as Children’s Day is being celebrated on the other side of the globe, you will call out to your Creator, that you will receive Him as Your Father, confessing your sins to Him and asking Him to welcome you into His family, coming to Him by faith in His Son, Jesus Christ. I’d love to call you my brother or sister and welcome you into the household of God.

And you were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience— among whom we all once lived in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind. But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved— and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.
Ephesians 2:1‭-‬10 ESV

The true light, which gives light to everyone, was coming into the world. He was in the world, and the world was made through him, yet the world did not know him. He came to his own, and his own people did not receive him. But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God, who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God.
John 1:9‭-‬13 ESV

For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!” The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him.
Romans 8:14‭-‬17 ESV

for in Christ Jesus you are all sons of God, through faith.
Galatians 3:26 ESV