Category: Women’s Ministry

O Death, Where is your Sting?

Published on by kendraskeLeave a comment

Last fall I was interviewed for a podcast called Side B stories. What an amazing experience!

Premier Unbelievable just released an article about my life. Crazy! God is so amazing! If only I could learn to write as well as the author of this article. WOW! Praise You, Lord!

Here’s a brief excerpt from the article. Click the link to read the rest,

“Former atheist, Kim Endraske, seriously wrestled with this existential reality. Fear of death was her constant companion. But that fear wasn’t enough for her to change her mind about God just to soothe a personal discomfort. After all, atheists are the adults in the room, called to soberly and courageously live with realities, such as death and dying, that may be personally unsettling. They are not to succumb to the childish notions of happily ever after in the afterlife. What was it then that changed Kim’s mind about the reality of God, and through that, lose her fear of death? 

O death, where is your victory?
O death, where is your sting?

1 Corinthians 15:55 ESV

“For it was fitting that he, for whom and by whom all things exist, in bringing many sons to glory, should make the founder of their salvation perfect through suffering. For he who sanctifies and those who are sanctified all have one source.

That is why he is not ashamed to call them brothers, saying, “I will tell of your name to my brothers; in the midst of the congregation I will sing your praise.” And again, “I will put my trust in him.” And again, “Behold, I and the children God has given me.”

Since therefore the children share in flesh and blood, he himself likewise partook of the same things, that through death he might destroy the one who has the power of death, that is, the devil, and deliver all those who through fear of death were subject to lifelong slavery.”

Hebrews 2:10-15
Christ is Risen – Matt Maher

Christ is Risen – Matt Maher

Let no one caught in sin remain
Inside the lie of inward shame
We fix our eyes upon the cross
And run to Him who showed great love

And bled for us
Freely You’ve bled for us

Christ is risen from the dead
Trampling over death by death
Come awake, come awake
Come and rise up from the grave
Christ is risen from the dead
We are one with Him again
Come awake, Come awake,
Come and rise up from the grave.

Beneath the weight of all our sin
You bowed to none but heaven’s will
No scheme of hell, no scoffer’s crown
No burden great can hold You down

In strength You reign
Forever let Your church proclaim

Christ is risen from the dead
Trampling over death by death
Come awake, come awake
Come and rise up from the grave

Christ is risen from the dead
We are one with Him again
Come awake, come awake
Come and rise up from the grave

O death, where is your sting?
O hell, where is your victory?
O church, come stand in the light
The glory of God has defeated the night

The Unloved Wife

Published on by kendraskeLeave a comment

Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Genesis 29-30

"When the LORD saw that Leah was hated, he opened her womb, but Rachel was barren. And Leah conceived and bore a son, and she called his name Reuben, for she said, “Because the LORD has looked upon my affliction; for now my husband will love me.” She conceived again and bore a son, and said, “Because the LORD has heard that I am hated, he has given me this son also.” And she called his name Simeon. Again she conceived and bore a son, and said, “Now this time my husband will be attached to me, because I have borne him three sons.” Therefore his name was called Levi. 

And she conceived again and bore a son, and said, “This time I will praise the LORD.” Therefore she called his name Judah. Then she ceased bearing." 

- Genesis 29:31-35

So often as women we feel like we control our own wombs. I remember a time of great marital struggles and infertility for my husband and I. Reading this story about Leah is such an encouragement to me. God has purpose both in our fertility and in our barrenness. May we bring him glory in both.

Yet when God gives Leah sons, she views them as tools to try to get her husband to love her.

Son #1: Now my husband will love me.

Son #2: The Lord has heard that I am hated.

Son #3: Now my husband will be attached to me.

Finally, Son #4: THIS TIME I WILL PRAISE THE LORD!

Yet, it’s this fourth son, Judah, whom God chose to father the line of the Messiah, the Savior of the World, Jesus Christ, God’s only Begotten Son. And it’s Leah, the unloved wife, whom God chose to bear Judah.

Are you feeling unloved today? I’ve been there. But so has Jesus. He knows how it feels to be rejected by those who were supposed to love Him. And He loves you. And He is worth more than a perfect husband or a thousand imperfect sons.

Let me pray over you.

Heavenly Father,

You are close to the broken-hearted. You are the God who remains faithful when man is faithless. You love the unloveable, the poor, the lonely, the rejected.

You are the good shepherd who pursues that lost sheep.

I pray that we would praise You when life is good and we would praise You when life is hard. No matter what, You are worthy of our praise.

We offer our hearts, minds, wombs, and lives to You. Father, fill them as You will in Your perfect timing and for Your purposes. Help us to trust You with our hearts and our hurts.

In the name of Jesus we pray, Amen.

The story of Abram – when a Husband Chose His Wife’s Wishes over God’s

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Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Proverbs 3:13-18; Genesis 16, 

"And Sarai said to Abram, “Behold now, the LORD has prevented me from bearing children. Go in to my servant; it may be that I shall obtain children by her.” And Abram listened to the voice of Sarai." - Genesis 16:2 ESV

Why, oh why, did Abram listen to his wife?

If only he had said, “No, Sarai. We must trust the Lord and wait upon Him. He is the generous giver of everything good. He will give us a child in His timing.”

It reminds me of Genesis 3 when Adam chose to listen to the voice of Eve rather than trusting and obeying God. 

"And to Adam, [God] said, “Because you have listened to the voice of your wife and have eaten of the tree of which I commanded you, ‘You shall not eat of it,’ cursed is the ground because of you; in pain you shall eat of it all the days of your life;" - Genesis 3:17 ESV

Both Adam and Abram faced lifelong consequences from their decision to heed their wives’ poor counsel.

Wives, we need to be very careful what we say to our husbands. Our husbands will so often go along with our suggestions – or demands – because they trust us, or they want to make us happy, or they want to make us stop complaining. We must consider carefully the consequences of the words we speak.

Will you join me in praying for our husbands, and ourselves, today?

Heavenly Father, You are a good God who loves to give good gifts to Your children. Your timing is always perfect. Please help us to trust You. Please help us to wait for Your perfect gifts. Let us not grow weary of doing good. Let us not give way to unbelief and doubt. Instead, give us the strength we need to fix our eyes on Jesus and to wait patiently for His salvation. Help us to be godly helpers who seek our husband’s good and Your glory.

Please forgive us Lord for the times when we have gone astray and even let her husband’s astray. We repent of our selfishness and pride.

We lift our husbands before You. We pray that they will cast all of their cares onto You and trust that You care for them. Let them not grow weak-kneed or cowardly. Help them to stand strong against temptation, especially when that temptation comes from our own lips.

In the name of Jesus, our perfect Savior, we pray, Amen.

God Most High – Jehovah El Elyon – and Jesus the Highest High Priest

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Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Proverbs 3:11-12; Psalm 17; Genesis 13-14

"And Melchizedek king of Salem brought out bread and wine. (He was priest of God Most High.) And he blessed him and said, “Blessed be Abram by God Most High, Possessor of heaven and earth; and blessed be God Most High, who has delivered your enemies into your hand!” And Abram gave him a tenth of everything. And the king of Sodom said to Abram, “Give me the persons, but take the goods for yourself.” But Abram said to the king of Sodom, “I have lifted my hand to the LORD, God Most High, Possessor of heaven and earth, that I would not take a thread or a sandal strap or anything that is yours, lest you should say, ‘I have made Abram rich.’" - Genesis 14:18-23 ESV

“I call upon you, for you will answer me, O God; incline your ear to me; hear my words. Wondrously show your steadfast love, O Savior of those who seek refuge from their adversaries at your right hand.” – Psalm 17:6-7 ESV

Melchizedek, the King of Righteousness, the King of Salem (Peace) (Jerusalem), a priest of God Most High, blessed Abram, acknowledging God’s blessing and protection of Abram.

Abram himself also acknowledges God’s power and authority to give Abram success and stuff. He, too, calls the Lord “El Elyon” – God Most High.

What does it mean that God is the God Most High?

As we read today in Genesis 13, God Most High is who gives offspring, who gives land, and who brings victory or defeat. But it is so much more than that.

God is the supreme sovereign authority over all things in heaven and on earth. Every knee bows before Him. He is the creator, sustainer, and owner of everything. He is the ruler over all things. He gives and takes away according to His will.

And Jesus Christ, God’s only Begotten Son, fully God and fully man, God in flesh, God with us, is our Great High Priest and King, higher than any earthly priest or king. Read more about this in Hebrews 7. Here’s a taste of it:

"For it was indeed fitting that we should have such a high priest, holy, innocent, unstained, separated from sinners, and exalted above the heavens. He has no need, like those high priests, to offer sacrifices daily, first for his own sins and then for those of the people, since he did this once for all when he offered up himself." - Hebrews 7:26-27 ESV

Will you pray with me? Remember we have the highest high priest, Jesus Christ, interceding for us and we pray to the Lord God Most High.

Heavenly Father, Most High, Creator of heaven and earth, Ruler of all creation,

What a privilege it is to come before you and to lay our needs at Your feet. We know that You hear us. We know that You see us. Even though You are almighty and transcendent over all creation, You love us, Your creation and children.

We ask You, Lord, to provide our daily bread to us, to forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us, and to protect us from the temptations of the evil one. Give us eyes to see You, and ears to hear Your voice. Strengthen our weak knees to follow You and go where You send us, trusting that You are indeed God Most High.

We pray for our husbands and children, that they will recognize Your Almighty power and mercy and holiness. Give them the strength to be humble and honest, to walk with integrity and honor. Give them hearts like yours.

In the Most High Name of Jesus Christ, our Savior, Redeemer, Lord, and Priest, Amen.

A Prayer for a Husband — Going Out, Not Knowing Where You’re Going

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Read Through the Bible in 2 Years: Proverbs 3:9-10; Genesis 12

"Now the LORD said to Abram, "Go from your country and your kindred and your father's house to the land that I will show you." - Genesis 12:1 ESV

Abram, too, finds his way into the Hebrews Hall of Faith, like Abel and Noah that we read about recently. 

"By faith Abraham obeyed when he was called to go out to a place that he was to receive as an inheritance. And he went out, not knowing where he was going." - Hebrews 11:8 ESV

In reading Genesis 12, I wanted to either focus on Abram failing to protect his beautiful wife from the advances of the Pharaoh or on Abram choosing to trust God and go out to an unknown land.

But, instead, I’m going to choose Door #3, that in spite of Abram’s great shortcomings, he was God’s chosen man called for a specific purpose. Like Noah, a righteous man, chosen by God for a great purpose who became drunk with wine shortly after surviving the worldwide flood, Abram obeys God in going out to this new place, yet he gives way to fear.

Like we read in Ephesians 2:8-10, “For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.”

From Abel to Noah to Abram to Bill and Kim Endraske, each of us have been saved by our faith, not by our works. Yet our faith will lead us to do works of faith, whether in offering good sacrifices, or building big boats, or going out to foreign lands, or writing blogs one-day-at-a-time, may we walk faithfully with our God.

Let’s pray together.

Heavenly Father,

Thank You for the precious gift of faith. You did not choose me because of any deed that I had done. In fact, You cast Your eyes and Your love upon me while I was Your enemy. You called me and chose me and drew me and put faith into me … and all I can say is THANK YOU!

Lord, I pray for my husband to hear You loud and clear. Help him to be strong and courageous and not to be afraid. Help him to resist the temptation to take the easy way out. Father, I pray that You will be faithful to complete the good work that You have begun in him. Direct his steps and protect him from the schemes and lies of the evil one. Give him the strength and wisdom to follow You. Help him to know Your Word and hear Your voice as You lead him.

Father, help us as wives to submit to our husbands, not to fear anything that is frightening. Encourage us to sit daily at Your feet, that we might trust You when life is scary. Help us to keep a careful watch over our mouths and our minds, thinking and speaking the truth in love. Make us godly helpmeets, doing good to our husbands all the days of his life, so that his heart can trust us and he will have no lack of gain.

Lord, we submit to You and Your will for our lives. We will go where you send us, when you send us, trusting that Your ways and thoughts are always better than ours.

In the Good and Sovereign Name of Jesus we pray, Amen.

Three Brothers and a Prayer for our Children

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Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Psalm 15, Genesis 9:18-10:32

"O LORD, who shall sojourn in your tent? Who shall dwell on your holy hill? 
He who walks blamelessly and does what is right and speaks truth in his heart; 
who does not slander with his tongue and does no evil to his neighbor, nor takes up a reproach against his friend; 
in whose eyes a vile person is despised, but who honors those who fear the LORD; 
who swears to his own hurt and does not change; 
who does not put out his money at interest and does not take a bribe against the innocent. 
He who does these things shall never be moved." - Psalm 15:1-5 ESV
"And Ham, the father of Canaan, saw the nakedness of his father and told his two brothers outside. Then Shem and Japheth took a garment, laid it on both their shoulders, and walked backward and covered the nakedness of their father. Their faces were turned backward, and they did not see their father’s nakedness." - Genesis 9:22-23 ESV

Earlier this week we read about two brothers: Cain and Abel. Today we read about three brothers: Shem, Ham, and Japheth, from whom every man and woman alive today are descended.

Three sons born of the same mom and dad. Three sons of righteous Noah. Three sons who saw the world destroyed in a worldwide flood. Three sons who survived in an ark built by their faithful father who heard from God and obeyed.

Yet, one son became a snitch who dishonored his dad while the other two sons chose humility and honor.

Why?

Why do some of our children walk blamelessly, doing right and speaking truth while others slander and do evil?

Why do some honor those who fear the Lord while others honor the vile and wicked?

I wish I had an answer but I don’t. What I do know, though, is that God is good and all-knowing and all-powerful. He has a plan and purpose through it all and He is working behind the scenes in His perfect timing and wisdom to accomplish good.

Like A.W. Tozer wrote in his classic book, Knowledge of the Holy, “All God’s acts are done in perfect wisdom, first for His own glory, and then for the highest good of the greatest number for the longest time. And all His acts are as pure as they are wise, and as good as they are wise and pure. Not only could His acts not be better done: a better way to do them could not be imagined.”

If you struggle with this, too, I suggest you read Romans 9 which addresses some of this issue.

Let’s pray together.

Heavenly Father,

We know that You alone are always good, always wise, and always in charge. We lay our questions and struggles at Your feet. We choose to trust You in things that we don’t understand.

We also choose to lay our children at Your feet, trusting You to work for their good. Please, Father, save our children from their own selfish pride and sinfulness. Open their eyes to see You and to see their need for salvation.

We pray that You will make us godly examples for our children. Keep us from drunkenness. Help us to be sober-minded and self-controlled. We want to be filled with Your Holy Spirit, walking by faith and living pure and holy lives.

Please protect our children from pride and jealousy and strife. Guide them to the truth that You bless the meek and humble. Remind them that love covers a multitude of sins.

In the Name of our Merciful and Wise Lord Jesus Christ, Amen.

Being Fruitful and Multiplying

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Read through the Bible in 2 years: Psalm 14, Genesis 8:1-9:17

"The fool says in his heart, "There is no God." 
They are corrupt, they do abominable deeds; there is none who does good.
The LORD looks down from heaven on the children of man, to see if there are any who understand, who seek after God.
They have all turned aside; together they have become corrupt; there is none who does good, not even one."
- Psalm 14:1-3
"And God blessed Noah and his sons and said to them, "Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth." - Genesis 9:1

Despite God’s recognition that the “intention of man’s heart is evil from his youth,” God commanded Noah and his sons to be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth. In fact, God repeated this command a second time. (Genesis 8:21, 9:1, 7)

Note that this command was directed at the men in the family, not the women. Women can’t have babies on their own. We need willing husbands in order to bear children. Both husbands and wives should be willing vessels for the blessings that the Lord wants to send to us.

Sisters, let’s not be like fools who think, say, or live like there is no God. Rather, let us receive with open hands, homes, and wombs the children that the Lord desires for us. As Christians, we should recognize the incredible gift that every child is, whether by adoption or conception.

We must also be fruitful and multiply the kingdom of God by training up our children in the way they should go. As mothers, we can be powerful disciple makers, bringing our children to the throne of God morning, noon, and night. Don’t underestimate the incredible impact of a humble, praying mother.

As my years of child bearing have ended, and this new season of grandmothering has begun, I pray that I’ll continue to live a fruitful, multiplying life – encouraging and serving my children as parents, teaching my grandchildren the ways of the Lord, and making disciples in my everyday life.

How can you lead a fruitful, multiplying life? I’d love to hear your comments.

Let’s pray together.

Heavenly Father,

You are a good Father who loves to give good gifts to Your children. Thank you for the precious gift it is to be a mother.

I pray that you would bless each of my children with children in Your perfect timing.

For those who are single, I pray that they will use this time to glorify You with their minds and lives, making the most of these days.

For those who are married and anxiously praying for a child, I pray that You will help them to wait well. I ask You, Lord, to give them children – by conception or adoption – fill their homes with the next generation of disciples of Christ.

For those who are married and in the thick of motherhood, I pray they will learn to cast all their cares on You, fully trusting that You care for them. I pray that You would make them fruitful and multiply and to receive each gift that you have ordained for them. I pray their husbands would desire the gift of children and be faithful servant leaders.

For those empty nesters and grandmothers, I pray they will use their time well, living reverent lives, teaching and serving well the younger women. Make them prayer warriors and arm-lifters and godly examples for those who are following in their footsteps.

In the wonderful name of Jesus I pray, Amen.

Learning from the Lives of Cain and Abel

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Read through the Bible in 2 years: Genesis 4-5

We don’t really know exactly why God accepted Abel’s offering, but not Cain’s, but I think Hebrews 11:4 gives us some insight.

"By faith Abel offered to God a more acceptable sacrifice than Cain, through which he was commended as righteous, God commending him by accepting his gifts. And through his faith, though he died, he still speaks." - Hebrews 11:4 ESV

Oftentimes, we want to do what seems right to us, rather than doing what God has said. We think, “What’s wrong with eating the fruit of that tree? It looks fine to me.” Or we think, “Why can’t I give God this fruit, I am a farmer after all?”

Yet, faith trusts God. Faith trusts that what God has said is right. Faith believes that God is good and all-knowing and that all His ways are right.

And like Hebrews 11:6 (explaining more about Abel and other men and women of faith) says, 

"Without faith it is impossible to please Him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who seek him." - Hebrews 11:6

Who are we seeking? Whose reward do we desire? Who are we trying to please? Are we pursuing our own pleasure and comfort or are we pursuing the Lord?

It’s like the words of Christ that we read in John – “Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life. If anyone serves Me, he must follow Me; and where I am, there will My servant be also. If anyone serves Me, the Father will honor him.” – John 12:25-26 ESV

We must not expect that when you’re living for the Lord that the world will love you. In fact, Abel’s life is an example for us. Like John wrote in 1 John 3:12-13 ESV — “We should not be like Cain, who was of the evil one and murdered his brother. And why did he murder him? Because his own deeds were evil and his brother’s righteous. Do not be surprised, brothers, that the world hates you.”

Cain said to the LORD, “My punishment is greater than I can bear." - Genesis 4:13 ESV

Were you taken aback when you read this? I was. When I first read this, I thought, “No, Cain, your punishment is much too light. You killed your brother. You deserve to be killed.” (In fact, Genesis 9:6 says just that.)

But as I’ve pondered it more, I see the foreshadowing of Christ bearing our sins, from the largest to the smallest. Cain deserved death for his sin, and though I’ve never murdered anyone physically, I deserve death for my sins, too. “For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.” – Romans 6:23 ESV

Yet I couldn’t bear the punishment for my sins any more than Cain or anyone else could.

But Christ bore our punishment in our place, that we can be justly forgiven by a just judge.

"[Jesus] committed no sin, neither was deceit found in his mouth. When he was reviled, he did not revile in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten, but continued entrusting himself to him who judges justly. He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, that we might die to sin and live to righteousness. By his wounds you have been healed." 1 Peter 2:22-24 ESV

Let’s pray.

Heavenly Father,

We come to You with hearts of thanksgiving for Your grace that You have lavished on us. We confess the hateful thoughts that we have had in our hearts toward men and women created in your image. We confess that we have often been jealous of others – The relationships they have, the talents they have, the possessions they have, even the faith they have. We confess we have often gone our own way rather than trusting Your character and Your Word.

We thank You for Jesus Christ the only perfect sin substitute, the Lamb of God who was slain for the sins of the world, including me.

We humbly ask You to forgive us and cleanse us through the blood of Christ that was shed for us.

Please, Heavenly Father, give us the strength and wisdom that we need to live like Christ – not repaying wrong with wrong, not repaying reviling with reviling, but overcoming evil with good. Help us to entrust ourselves to You, the only one who judges justly. We pray that our lights would shine brightly – even when the world is yelling at us to turn our lights out. May we shine brightly for You.

In the holy and merciful name of Jesus we pray, Amen.

Craftiness and Blame-shifting

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Read through the Bible in 2 years: Genesis 3

My, how quickly things can change! God creates a very good universe and in steps that crafty, cunning, shrewd snake, the devil.

Like we read in John – “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy” (John 10:10 ESV). “He was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks out of his own character, for he is a liar and the father of lies” (John 8:44 ESV).

While God speaks for man’s good, the serpent speaks for our harm. Notice that the serpent pursued the woman, not the man. Yet, the man is not exempt from his own responsibility to lead and protect his wife. It says in Genesis 3:6 that Adam was with the woman. Also notice that Adam not only allowed his wife to eat, but he ate with her, too.

And God speaks first to Adam … And then comes the blame-shifting. Adam blames the woman, but also subtly blames God saying, “The woman whom You gave to be with me, she gave me fruit of the tree and I ate.” (Genesis 3:12) Eve then blames the serpent for her disobedience. (Genesis 3:13)

We need to be careful not to shift blame to other people, our husband, our children, the cashier at the grocery store, the customer service representative on the phone. We need to be careful not to shift blame to our circumstances – I was hungry. I was tired. I’d a long day. It was “that time of the month.”

Those blame-shifting thoughts and words are usually true, yet they are not helpful or humble. Adam and Eve spoke the truth, but their hearts were proud and stubborn.

Instead, let’s accept responsibility for our own sin, confess it to God, and repent of it. Don’t forget that repentance is more than just feeling remorse, feeling sorry that you did something bad. True repentance involves turning away from evil and turning your face toward God.

And when we repent, we can be sure of God’s loving forgiveness. Like we read in 1 John 1:9-10 ESV — “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us.”

There still might be consequences of our sin. Adam and Eve still had to leave the garden. They still had to face death. Yet, God is so gracious and loving – He himself made garments to clothe Adam and Eve, and He will clothe us in pure white garments through faith in Jesus Christ who shed His blood to cleanse us of our sin.

For further study – read Romans 5:12-21; Romans 6:23; Revelation 3:5, 18 and Revelation 19:7-9.

Will you pray with me?

Heavenly Father, We don’t want to be like that crafty snake. We don’t want to be deceivers or blame shifters. Please help us to accept responsibility for our sinful thoughts, attitudes, words and actions.

Thank you for sending Your only son, Jesus Christ, to pay the price for our sin, shedding His blood to pay the price that we could be forgiven.

We confess to You how often we have chosen to follow our own selfish desires instead of following Your clear commands. Please help us to be wise in what is good and innocent in what is evil.

Help us to trust You and lean not on our own understanding, but to acknowledge You in all of our ways. We pray that You would direct our steps in a way that brings You honor and glory, and brings us and those around us good.

It is in the holy and righteous name of Jesus that we pray, Amen

The Gift of Being Created to be a Helper

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Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Genesis 1-2

I like to read Genesis one and two together because I see Genesis chapter two as an expansion of the account of the creation of man in chapter 1. There’s so much in these two chapters that I read both of them together, two days in a row.

Then the LORD God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” 

Now out of the ground the LORD God had formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name. The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him. 

So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. And the rib that the LORD God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 

Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.”

Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh." - Genesis 2:18-24 ESV

God saw that it was not good for Adam to be alone, so He wanted to give Adam a helper who was fit for him. Not just any helper would do. He didn’t just need the strength of an ox or the beauty of a peacock or the loyalty of a dog. No, Adam needed a suitable helper, designed especially for man, and so God gave him a woman.

Being a helper is a gift to both the man and the woman. The man needs the woman … And the woman has been given a very important job.

In God’s perfect timing, I’m writing this as I’m visiting my parents hundreds of miles away from my husband. I can assure you, my husband misses me. Yes, he misses me cooking and cleaning for him. Yes, he misses me making his morning coffee. Whether he misses them or not, he needs my little reminders and extra set of hands. But I think he especially misses my company, having to talk to and share life with.

And this is a great blessing! It is good to be needed and missed.

We need to be so careful to not allow our children to take our husband’s place. Children are made from the seed of their father, not from his rib … or yours. Children are created to leave their parents, but husbands and wives are created to become one flesh until they are parted by death.

Sisters, don’t leave your husband in the dust while you’re attending to your babies. Those babies are going to grow up and move away, but your husband will be by your side for the rest of his life. He needs you and you need to be needed. Make sure you keep your children and your husband in their rightful places in your hearts, minds, and lives.

I speak from personal experience – this is hard, but it can be done. Here are a few ideas I’ve learned (and am still learning) over my 28 years of marriage.

  • Schedule regular dates with your husband to keep those flames of friendship burning.
  • Look for something small that you can do to serve your husband every day – make him a cup of coffee or write him a little note or send him a text over lunch.
  • Express to your husband (and others) how grateful you are for him. Let them know how much they mean to you and how much you value them.
  • Keep a careful watch over your thought life. Complaining thoughts turn into complaining attitudes and complaining words. Nothing works more powerfully against your marriage than having a complaining Spirit. When those thoughts (true though they might be) come into your mind, grab hold of them and replace them with the truths of hope and grace found at the foot of the cross.
  • Make praying for your husband a priority. Ask God to bless him and guide him. Check out this video to a wonderful prayer for your husband – from his head to his feet.

Let’s pray now.

Heavenly Father,

Thank You so much for the gift that my husband is. Thank You for making me his helper. Thank You for making him such that he needed me. And thank You for making me fit for him.

Help me to recognize the blessing it is to be needed. I pray that I would make my husband a priority in my life. Help me to do him good and not harm all the days of his life. Help me to submit myself willingly and cheerfully to him, and to trust You, Lord, in the process.

Father, help me not to grow weary of doing good and to trust that in due season I will reap harvest if I do not lose heart.

I pray that You would bless my husband with every spiritual blessing according to the riches of Your glory in Christ Jesus. I pray that You would take care of him physically, spiritually, and emotionally. Give him the strength and wisdom that he needs to lead our family. And give him the humility that he needs to turn to You in his weakness.

In the good and gracious name of Jesus I pray.

Amen.