Angry with Man and with God: Thoughts from 2 Samuel 6.

Read through the Bible in 2 Years: 2 Samuel 6.

Have you ever been mad at someone, not just for a few minutes, but for hours or days? Have you ever allowed your anger to stew like a 8-pound chuck roast left in a crockpot to bubble all day, causing a seed of bitterness to take root deep in your heart?

How did that effect your relationship with that person? How was your attitude toward them? Did that bitterness ever make it hard for you to think kind thoughts or speak kind words about them?

Now, how about your feelings toward God? Have you ever been mad at God for days or weeks? Have you ever felt like He didn’t treat you or a loved one the way He should’ve? Did you ever let that anger plant a seed, no matter how small, of contempt toward God?

How did that effect your relationship with or your attitude toward God? Did it make it hard for you to meet with Him or submit to His commands?

In my life, I’ve noticed that often my bitterness
toward a person is intimately tied to
my disappointment with God.

Maybe a friend, a parent, a sibling or even a spouse has hurt you deeply. They’ve let you down. They’ve attacked you and disappointed you. They’ve done you wrong. Maybe it’s substance abuse or pornography. Maybe it’s lying and deceit. Maybe it’s an emotional or physical affair. Maybe it’s a lack of regard for your thoughts and feelings.

How has that relationship with a human being effected your relationship with God?

How have your feelings toward a person effected your feelings toward God?

In today’s passage in 2 Samuel 6, we read about Michal, King Saul’s daughter and David’s first wife, who despised David in her heart when she witnessed his joy before the Lord. Michal had been hurt again and again by David, a man she had loved. David had taken other wives and then had allowed her to be sent away, only to be brought back after she’d married another man. I don’t know that Michal ever trusted in God. In fact, Michal may have been a pagan idol-worshipper, but we do know that it grieved her deeply to see David dancing with reckless abandon in the presence of God and all the house of Israel. Click here to read through an overview of Michal’s life in the scriptures.

Thinking through Michal’s response to David’s joyful worship, I asked myself these two questions:

  1. When have my feelings of disappointment toward a fellow human being resulted in me treating them with disdain and contempt rather than love and forgiveness?
  2. When have my feelings of disappointment with my Heavenly Father resulted in me turning my back on Him rather than turning my face toward His open arms?

Heavenly Father, Your ways are certainly not our ways. You are always holy and righteous and good, and we are not. You have told us what You require of us, yet we have disobeyed You again and again. We have shunned Your scriptures. We have mocked Your Words and Your workers. We have treated Your Creation and Your commands with contempt. We have blamed You for circumstances that we have brought upon ourselves. We have turned our backs to You instead of our faces. Please, Father, forgive us. Remove the root of bitterness from our hearts, bitterness toward our fellow sinful man and bitterness toward You, our perfect Father. Renew a right spirit in us. Give us a new heart, a new mind, and a new soul. Strengthen us to love others as You have loved us. Help us to love You, our Lord and God, with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength. Help us to cast all our cares upon You and to trust that You care for us. Help us to fully believe that You are at work, working all things together for good for those who love You and have been called according to Your purposes, bringing beauty out of the ashes of our lives. In the Name of Jesus Christ who died in my place I pray. Amen.

Coming out of the Closet. Thoughts on Gender Identity from 2 Samuel 5.

Read through the Bible in 2 Years: 2 Samuel 5

Today as I asked God what I should write about in today’s blog post, I couldn’t shake the thought that I was supposed to write on the topic of genders. So, in fearful obedience, here it goes.

Growing up in the ’70s and ’80s, the thought that there were anything beyond two genders never even entered my mind. My sister and I were girls. My mom was a girl. My dad was a boy. My cat, Bandit, who I’d adopted off the streets as a stray was a boy, too. I always wished that my mom and dad would have another baby, a boy, so I could have a little brother to play with and boss around. My world was made up of two genders: boys and girls, sons and daughters, brothers and sisters, men and women, males and females.

Though I wasn’t a Christian and though I believed that the world and everything in it had evolved through a series of random events, it was still clear to my rational , scientific brain that everything that reproduced was either a male or a female. Roosters and hens, bucks and does, worker bees and queen bees, males and females.

In today’s chapter, 2 Samuel 5, verse 13 says, “And David took more concubines and wives from Jerusalem, after he came from Hebron, and more sons and daughters were born to David.” David was a male, and every single one of David’s concubines and wives were female. All of David’s sons were male, and all of David’s daughters were female.

My dad and my cat both had operations that prevented them from fathering babies, but they were still male. In fact, my dad could have grown his hair long, and worn a mini skirt, heels and a stuffed bra, and it wouldn’t make him female. He could even have changed his name to something more neutral or feminine, and left my mom for a guy, but my dad would still have been a male. Why? Because that’s how he was born. Dare I say, that’s how he was made by His Creator? When my father was knit together in his mother’s womb, he received an x chromosome from his mom and a y chromosome from his dad, and he was born a boy.

This issue is especially personal for me for a whole myriad of reasons. I won’t go into all of them here but one of them is this: when my sister and I were young, my parents usually kept our hair cut short and dressed us in very simple gender neutral clothing. I liked climbing trees and getting dirty. I didn’t like playing with Barbies. My best friend most years was a boy. But did those things make me a boy? No. They didn’t. I was a girl, whether I liked it or not. That’s how I was born. That’s how I was made by my Creator. When I was knit together in my mother’s womb, I received an x chromosome from my mom and an x chromosome from my dad, and I was born a girl.

Back in the ’80s, when I was teenager, it was shameful to admit that you had homosexual desires. A person was said to “come out of the closet” when they confessed to homosexual tendencies. Now here we are in the “roaring 2020s,” and it’s shameful to stand up for Biblical gender identities, but today I’m taking a stand. I refuse to hide in the closet, ashamed of the Bible’s very clear teaching that God gave David sons and daughters. David’s sons were boys and his daughters were girls. God created them male and female just like He’s been doing from the beginning of time and to say anything else is a lie, a lie that hurts both the Creator and the creature.

Will you join me in prayer?

Heavenly Father, I come to You with the deepest gratitude for making me to be me. Thank You for making me a girl and granting me the gift of being a mom. Thank You for giving me sons and daughters. I pray that You will encourage the people of this generation to love You as their Creator by accepting themselves for how they’ve been made – their hair color and skin color, their height and their gender. You don’t make junk. We do. We take what You have made and we ruin it, hurting others and hurting ourselves. And hurting You in the process. Forgive us, Lord. I pray that You will also encourage the people of this generation to stand up for what they know is true, what the Scriptures so clearly state, that You are the Creator and that You create male or female. Help us not to be ashamed of the gospel and not to be ashamed of the truth of Your Word. Please, Father, help us to defend our faith with gentleness, respect, and humility, for the glory of Your Name and the good of Your creation. In the Name of Jesus Christ I pray. Amen.

Advent Day 7 – Forgiving and Being Forgiven (Genesis 37-50 + Luke 7)

Read through the Bible in 2 years: Luke 7

Thursday night, our family read the seventh advent devotional in “From Creation to Christ” along with Luke 7. If you don’t have your own copy, you can order your own a Kindle version instantly, while you wait for the paper copy to arrive.

I’m really loving this “mash up” of the advent devotional with the daily reading in Luke. We’re all having fun finding connection points.

How was Joseph able to forgive his brothers after they had perpetrated such great sin against him? I think the answer might be found in Luke 7.

“Then turning toward the woman [Jesus] said to Simon, “Do you see this woman? I entered your house; you gave me no water for my feet, but she has wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. You gave me no kiss, but from the time I came in she has not ceased to kiss my feet. You did not anoint my head with oil, but she has anointed my feet with ointment. Therefore I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven–for she loved much. But he who is forgiven little, loves little.”

And he said to her, “Your sins are forgiven.”

Then those who were at table with him began to say among themselves, “Who is this, who even forgives sins?” And he said to the woman, “Your faith has saved you; go in peace.””

– Luke 7:44-50 ESV

So long as I think my sins aren’t really that bad, it’s hard to forgive other people. But when I recognize how much God has forgiven me, then I’m able to love God and love others. And if I think that God is mean to allow such terrible things into my life, then I will be bitter toward Him and toward others as well. But if I think that God is the master weaver, creating a masterpiece of my life, then I will humbly accept whatever others do to me and keep praising Him through it all.

Heavenly Father, I know that You are good. I trust You. Help me to love others with the love that You have poured out lavishly on me. Help me to remember how MUCH I have been forgiven, how GREAT my sins are and have been. Help me to be so busy working on getting the log out of my own eye that I don’t dwell so much on the splinter in my brother’s. I love You, Lord. Help me to love You more!

A Prayer from Hannah’s Prayer in 1 Samuel 2

Read through the Bible in 2 Years: 1 Samuel 2.

Let’s pray and worship the Lord together with Hannah and believers around the world.

My heart rejoices in You, Lord, for You have raised me up from the ash heap and set my feet on the solid rock of salvation in Jesus Christ, our Lord.

I rejoice in You, my God, for there is none holy like You. There is none besides you, Father. Indeed, there is no rock like our God.

Keep me humble, Father. Let me not become arrogant or proud. Help me to remember that You are a righteous judge, knowing and seeing all things, both visible and invisible. Help me to see the log in my own eye. Keep me on my knees in humility before Your throne of grace.

Increase my faith, Lord. You break the bows of the mighty, and You give strength to the weak. You make the full hungry and the hungry full. You give children to the barren, and You take children from those who have many. The number of every man’s days are held in Your hand.

You have given Your only Son, Jesus Christ, that we may be forgiven and redeemed and receive the gift of eternal life with You. Make us ambassadors for Your kingdom, sharing the good news to all four corners of the earth and making disciples of all the nations.

You, Father, are the giver of every good gift, of children and wealth and power and wisdom. Help us to be good stewards of these gifts. Make us instruments of Your peace, blessing the needy with all that You have blessed us, our time, talents, treasures, and testimonies.

The whole world is in Your hands, Father. We pray for the leaders of our nation and the nations around the world. Guide them. Grant them wisdom. Give them strength. Humble and exalt in Your perfect wisdom and timing, and help us to trust and worship You no matter the cost.

In the Mighty Name of Jesus Christ who is the Way, the Truth, and the Life, we pray. Amen.

Instruments of Your Peace

Foreigners Made Citizens of Heaven – From Abram to Ruth to Me

Read through the Bible in 2 years: Ruth 2

Ruth, a widowed Moabite woman, found safety in the providence of God and in the fields of Boaz, her Israelite kinsmen redeemer.

Have you ever considered the fact that God called Abram, a man living in Ur of the Chaldeans, to come to Canaan and be the great father of the Israelite nation? God could’ve chosen someone already living in the Promised Land, but He didn’t. God called Abram to leave his people and his land and to go to a land that he would show him, and he did.

God chose a foreign-born woman, Ruth, to be the great grandmother of King David, the forefather of Jesus Christ Himself. God could’ve chosen Naomi herself, a Jew, but He didn’t. God called Ruth to leave her people and her land and to follow her mother-in-law back to her land, and she did.

And now, three thousand years later, God chose me, a young woman running from God, blaspheming His name, scoffing at His followers, to carry His Word across the world wide web to foreign nations around the world. He could’ve chosen my sister-in-law who grew up in church, but He didn’t. God called me to wake up before dawn, to turn on my computer and teach, morning by morning, and I’m trying. 😁

Heavenly Father, have Your way with me. Help me to trust You and walk humbly with You, my God. You are the God of Redemption and Power, the God of Holiness and Second Chances. You are the Tapestry-Weaving God of Life and Purpose. We worship You, Lord, and thank You for Your mercy. Help us to reach out to the foreigner dwelling among us for Your glory, never forgetting that You desire the worship of people all over the globe. We want to be faithful to make disciples of all nations. In the Name of Jesus Christ I pray. Amen.

Are you looking for a family friendly advent devotional? Two years ago I got in print what had been in my heart, head, and mouth for the last decade with my own kids. I hope it blesses you. It’s available in paperback or ebook versions. Download a PDF of all 25 ornaments free here.

“From Creation to Christ: A Family Advent Devotional Tracing the Story of the Savior Through Scripture, Stories, Songs, and Pictures”
by Kim Endraske

Day 11 of the Devotional is about Ruth and Boaz. Enjoy!

The Blessing of a Christian Mother-in-Law: Naomi, Ruth, Jan, and Me

Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Ruth 1

Did you know that the famous words from Ruth 1:16, “For where you go I will go, and where you lodge I will lodge. Your people shall be my people, and your God my God,” were spoken by Ruth to her mother-in-law, not her husband? Well, now you do. In fact, Ruth said this to her mother-in-law after her husband’s death.

My grandma made this for me as a wedding gift. Ruth 1:16.
Baby #1 – very tired parents, very happy grandparents

Little did my Grandma know when she cross-stitched Ruth 1:16 for a wedding gift for me what an enormous impact my mother-in-law would have on my life. To be honest, as a young bride I struggled in my relationship with my mother-in-law, but God…. God used my mother-in-law’s patience, kindness, and forgiveness to draw me to better understand God’s patience, kindness, and forgiveness.

How’s your relationship with your mother-in-law? Rather than looking at all the things she’s done wrong, try looking instead at all the things she’s done right. You married her son. She must’ve done something well. Next time you start thinking about all the ways you’d like her to change, try looking at what you could change to improve your relationship with her. Could you be more patient, kind, and forgiving toward her? Start there and see what God does. And if you need to make a call or have a face-to-face chat about some hard feelings from something that happened days, months, or years ago, do it. Today. Don’t let bitterness take root and spoil the good fruit that God wants to bear through you.

At Baby #1’s wedding shower

Heavenly Father, Thank You, Lord, for the gift of a mother-in-law who loves You and who loves me. Help me to be grateful and to recognize that this truly is a gift. Thank you for blessing my son with a wife and my daughter with a husband. Give me the wisdom and strength I need to be a patient, kind, and forgiving mother-in-law myself. In the Name of Jesus Christ I pray. Amen.

God Speaks to Women, Too: A Lesson from Judges 13 in the Life of Samson

Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Judges 13

An angel appeared to Hagar in the desert (Genesis 16) and to Mary, the mother of our Savior Jesus (Luke 1). The Lord answered the prayers of Hannah when she asked for a son (1 Samuel 1). Abigail’s discernment and quick actions spared David from having revenge on foolish Nabal (1 Samuel 25).

Here, in Judges 13, the Lord has chosen Manoah’s unnamed wife, a barren, childless woman, to be His messenger to her husband.

Sisters, God wants to use you as a blessing to your husband, your children, your church, and your community. He has a purpose for you.

Whether you’re married or not, whether you have a house full of kids or not, if God has chosen you as His child, then He has chosen you to be His ambassador, a messenger of the most high God.

Heavenly Father, I pray that I would call out to You, seeking You, morning by morning and evening by evening and that I would hear Your voice as You answer me. You have chosen me to be a vessel of Your grace. May that grace overflow to my husband and my children and their children. May that grace bring glory to Your Name. Give my husband and I discernment as we listen for Your voice. Help us to know when You are speaking and grant us unity in Your Holy Spirit. Help us both to be humble toward each other and to You. In the Name of Jesus Christ I pray. Amen.

Deborah and Jael, Women Called to do Hard Things: Judges 4-5

Read through the Bible in 2 Years: Judges 4-5

God has often asked me to do things that, frankly, I don’t want to do. I didn’t want to homeschool. I didn’t want to start a ministry to women who were continuing their pregnancy after finding out something was wrong with their unborn baby. And every time the Lord has told me to go talk to someone I’m having conflict with, I’ve tried to come up with excuses for why I’m not the right person for the job.

Why did God call Deborah to judge Israel? Why didn’t He choose Deborah’s husband, Lappidoth, or that mighty warrior, Barak?

Why did God choose Jael to put a tent stake through King Sisera’s skull? Wouldn’t her father or her husband or her brother or her son have been a better choice?

The answer to these questions is this: I have no idea. 🤷‍♀️

But I do know that God’s ways are higher than ours (Isaiah 55:8-8), and God uses the weak to shame the strong (1 Corinthians 1:27). I do know that God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble (James 4:6, 1 Peter 5:5) I know that it is the Lord who gives both life and death (Deuteronomy 32:39, 1 Samuel 2:6), and He can use whoever He pleases to accomplish His purposes.

Is God calling you to do something hard,
something impossible,
something you don’t want to do?

Listen carefully to His voice.Fix your eyes on Him and allow Him to guide you by the truth of His Word and His Holy Spirit.

Fix your eyes on Him and allow Him to guide you by the truth of His Word and His Holy Spirit.

Walk by faith and not by sight.

Do the next thing – by faith in His power and might.

Heavenly Father, what a blessing and gift to know You, to be clay in Your hands. Use us for whatever You’ve called us to. Make us Your vessels, Your instruments, Your servants and ambassadors and ministers, that the lost would find hope and rest and peace at the feet of Jesus Christ, our deliverer and judge. In His Name we pray. Amen.

I’m a New Creation in Christ: My Interview with Kelly Hall on her Unshakable Hope Podcast

Read through the Bible in 2 Years: 2 Corinthians 5

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation. Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, God making his appeal through us. We implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God. For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.

2 Corinthians 5:17-21 ESV

Kelly Hall and I first met almost thirty years ago when I was a first year teacher at Central Institute for the Deaf in St. Louis, Missouri. Little did I know then how God would mightily use Kelly and her courageous faith in my life. Kelly and I had lost touch after exchanging annual Christmas letters for many years only to be reconnected about five years ago when I discovered that my faithful Memphis area prayer partner, Beth, also knew Kelly from their husbands’ mutual service in the air force in Texas! Isn’t God amazing?!? He is the great tapestry weaver.

I hope you’ll take a half hour of your time to tune in to my interview on Kelly Hall’s Unshakable Hope podcast and consider subscribing to be alerted as she releases new ones.

https://kellyhall.org/podcast/episode-19-from-out-spoken-atheist-to-devoted-follower-of-jesus-kim-endraske/

Act Like Men: Stand Firm, Be Strong, and … Love Well

Read through the Bible in 2 Years: 1 Corinthians 16

We hear 1 Corinthians 13 read at every wedding. Love is patient and kind. Love does envy or boast. Love is not proud or rude. Isn’t it beautiful?

But love is also steadfast and firm, immovable and strong. Love is a mother telling her toddler, “No,” a hundred times in the same day. Love is a grown daughter telling her alcoholic mom that she’s got a problem. Love is refusing to stand idly by while pornography tries to ruin your marriage or homosexuality tries to steal your teenager.

Be watchful, stand firm in the faith,
act like men, be strong.
Let all that you do be done in love.


1 Corinthians 16:13-14 ESV

Love takes guts. Love takes strength. Love takes the stamina of a thoroughbred racehorse and the patience of Job. Love requires you to be willing to get battle scars for the sake of another because you believe they’re worth the fight.

Ladies, sisters, friends, act like men. Be watchful. Stand firm in the faith. Be strong. Let all that you do be done in love.

Heavenly Father, Your Son, Jesus Christ, is the perfect manifestation of manhood and love. Strength and humility. Stamina and kindness. Make us more like Him. Teach us, show us, how to love like He loves, how to give up our lives for another, to be willing to suffer to save someone else. We need You, Father. We can’t do it on our own. In the Name of Jesus Christ, the Lover of my Soul. Amen.